


Let fate draw over our skin, but never in our life.

by Achlyz



Category: The Good Doctor (TV 2017)
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Everything is generally the same but with soulmarks, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Jealous Neil, M/M, Mentions of alcohol, Own Original Character, Soulmates, Soulmates AU, The Author Regrets Everything, mentions of steve - Freeform, protective neil, this fic wouldn't be this long if they just talk about their feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:49:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 32,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24587149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Achlyz/pseuds/Achlyz
Summary: The concept of soulmate marks is to ensure everyone that has it that there is someone out there for you, someone who will love you until the day you die. Neil thinks that he could never love someone other than his soulmate, but his plan to meet his soulmate, to love his significant other, all went down the drain the moment he fell in love with no other than Shaun Murphy. And right then and there Neil thinks fate can be altered as long as you are determine to do so. After all, Neil wouldn't let his soulmate mark be in the way of him loving Shaun.
Relationships: Claire Browne/Jared Kalu, Neil Melendez/Shaun Murphy
Comments: 19
Kudos: 170





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Nika2804](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nika2804/gifts).



**A fun little fact, I have never watched a single episode of the Good Doctor and yet I kept on writing stories for this fandom simply because of my cousin (Nika2804 shit, the author of the ongoing fic titled “Resonate with you”) is a sad little potato because of the fact that the Murlendez pairing has a very limited stories. So here I am writing another long fic. Unlike my other fics, this will not be a one shot but I reassure you that I would finish this by next week :D This will probably have 1-3 chapters depending on the flow I make.**

**Little bit of note, I was actually writing another fic the other day and I am almost finished I was just about to save it then post it in Ao3 but my laptop crashed and I wasn’t able to retrieve it. So yeaaah, I’m just gonna write another one instead of re-writing it, so basically this is my fourth fic for this fandom :D If this fic get a positive respond I might re-write the one that has been deleted accidentally.**

**~o~oOo~o~**

The concept of soulmate marks has appeared since the beginning of time. Almost 98% of the world’s population has a tattoo embedded in any parts of their body the moment they are born. It is said that the tattoos would symbolize the one who is meant for you, it could be in a form of any shape, abstract symbol, even an animal. The other 2% of the population who doesn’t have a mark on them are so rare that often times you wouldn’t know if markless people really exist. Soulmate marks also varies in color, the most common one is a simple black tattoo, some people has their soulmate marks with color but that doesn’t make it easier for them to find their other half. If your soulmate dies, a permanent scar would appear on top of your soulmate mark, making it almost impossible to determine the shape or even form of your soulmate mark. The scar won’t hurt you, but it would be a physical reminder that the one who is supposed to be with you for the rest of your life is simply gone.

Neil never fails to admire the beauty of his own soulmate mark which is located in his lower arm which is very visible for everyone to see (not that he minds it, it is a very beautiful tattoo after all), it is a geometric deer tattoo with an ombre effect of a very light blue to a very dark shade of blue. Neil always thought that whoever is his soulmate must be so beautiful (he is basing it in the beauty of the color in his tattoo) and has a complex mind or personality (the geometric shape) if his tattoo is any indication.

The moment Neil’s eyes landed on his tattoo he swore to himself to find whoever is destined to be with him and not date any other people, after all why bother dating other people if there is someone out there for you? A person who is supposed to make you into a better person, to help you grow and most importantly love you unconditionally? Even after reaching the age of 30 without any luck in finding someone who has the same soulmate mark as him, Neil never gave up. He could feel it within himself that the wait for his significant other half would be all worth it. That’s what he has been telling himself, until the moment he met _Shaun Murphy._

At first glance Neil didn’t like him _at all_. He challenged his decision almost every day in their work place and it annoys the hell out of Neil. Shaun never fails to intellectually challenge him and his decision, on what is best for their patients. But after 2 years of working with him, Neil started seeing Shaun in a different light. After personally getting over his prejudiced against Shaun, and making a sincere effort to get to know the younger resident better, Neil slowly but surely started to like Shaun as an individual. In the span of those 2 years of working with Shaun, he never finds a dull day anymore. Somehow when he started liking Shaun, Neil could every day appreciate him. Neil finds himself being drawn to Shaun, like a magnet. Neil could see how compatible he and Shaun are, compatible yet at the same time _different_ from one another. They simply balance each other out.

The moment Neil realizes his feeling for his younger resident, his soulmate seems... unimportant to him now. Like if he were to chose between Shaun and his soulmate that he waited for his entire life, he would no doubt choose Shaun in a heartbeat. And surprisingly, he doesn’t mind that thought at all. Having a beautiful tattoo compares _nothing_ if he gets to have Shaun by his side.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Neil and his residents are currently having an early lunch in the cafeteria. They all made it a habit to eat all together if possible; they all grew to be close to one another in which all of them consider each other as genuine friends inside and outside of work and Neil thinks that it is by far the best group of people he could be friends with. As always they occupy one large table, with Shaun always by his side whenever they eat.

“By the way I should all tell you before I forget...” Neil started but he immediately looked at Shaun in a threatening way because Neil knows that Shaun would make a jab or remark about his ‘failing memory’ due to his ‘old age’ Shaun’s words not his. Shaun looked at him innocently blinking his mouth already halfway open

“I didn’t even say anything Dr. Melendez” if he didn’t know Shaun any better now, he would have believe the act but well, he knows Shaun already like the back of his hand. Just like how the other residents knows Shaun by now, if their chuckling is any indication that they know exactly what Shaun was about to say.

Neil’s glare didn’t last long as he stares at Shaun, he could feel a small smile forming in his lips “I know, but you are thinking it”

“Come on Dr. Melendez stop bullying Shaun” Jared said clearly enjoying where this conversation is headed to. Besides him, Claire started to laugh softy before adding “That’s right Dr. Melendez, Shaun would never say such a thing”

Alex and Morgan smirked at the Neil’s growing frustration upon being once again ganged up by his very own residents. “If we could, we would file a report to Dr. Andrews on how you treat Shaun Dr. Melendez, this is clearly a case of bullying” Alex said as he pointedly ignored Neil’s glare towards his way

“You are an ex-cop and that’s what you think without any basis or any evidence on hand? It’s a good thing you switched careers then” now it’s Neil’s turn to smirked at Alex who is _maturely_ sticking out his tongue in Neil’s direction, Neil would not stoop down in his level so instead he throws a clean napkin in Alex’s direction, which mistakenly hit Morgan in the face. The moment Morgan looked at Neil, Neil points his fingers at Jared clearly pointing out that it was Jared who threw the napkin not him.

“Now that’s assault Dr. Melendez, I would make sure that you would lose your license because of this” Morgan deadpanned as she picked up the fallen napkin so she could properly dispose of it.

“I really need to start eating again alone in my office where there is peace” Neil huffed out as he crossed his arms in front of him.

Shaun lightly laughed at his statement causing Neil to look at Shaun “You can’t do that” Shaun suddenly gave Neil a disappointing look in his face “You work in the office, you eat here in the cafeteria, don’t mix the two up”

Neil can hear that his other residents are covering up their laughs as they know that if someone could scold Neil and get away with it, it would be Shaun. Not even Marcus himself can scold Neil, simply because Neil wouldn’t listen to him anyway. Neil glared at every single one of them before feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket. All of them curiously looked at Neil as he reads the massage he received. Neil sighs as he returned his phone in his pocket; all them could feel the sudden tension in Neil’s expression.

“Are you okay Neil?” Neil looked at Shaun as he could feel the worry in Shaun’s tone as he asked Neil. Neil smiles reassuringly “It’s just that... a temporary surgeon would be here in the hospital for a week. He is considering working here if by the end of the week he decided to accept the job here or go back to New York instead.”

Jared raised his eyebrow at his statement “That isn’t so bad” Claire and the other nodded at agreement aside from Shaun who is still looking at Neil with concerned in his face

Neil looked at Jared before continuing “And if he did accept the job here, two of my residents and two of Audrey’s would have to transfer to him. And he gets to chose whom. But since he is here for just a week Marcus told me he gets to chose just one resident from me not Audrey’s”

Silence has fallen into their table as Neil’s words sink into them. Claire and Jared suddenly cringe as memory of their encounter with Matt Coyle somehow resurfaced in their memories. They would not want a repeat if ever this new surgeon is just like Coyle. Neil looked at Shaun who is now looking at everywhere but him and the people at the table.

“It’s just for the week, I hope. But that’s what I was about to tell you all a while ago.” Neil looked at Shaun, determination in his eyes. He gently grabs Shaun’s hands as he gently caressed Shaun’s hand with his own. When he finally got Shaun’s attention, Neil gently smiled at him “Don’t worry Shaun, I know you are not keen into change. I will fight for you okay? If this new surgeon wants you in his team, I would do anything to keep you under me okay? I won’t let anything that you don’t want to happen, if I could do something about it.”

Shaun could feel himself calm down at Neil’s words. Shaun broke off eye contact with Neil so he could look at the other’s reaction or expression. All of them are smiling at Shaun, _a genuine smile_. As if saying that they would also make sure he won’t do anything that he isn’t comfortable with. Shaun finally looked back at Neil “Okay” he whispered. Neil smiled because he knows that what Shaun said isn’t just a word of confirmation but also a silent _thank you_. Neil swore that he would protect Shaun at anything or _anyone_ that he would find threatening to Shaun’s wellbeing, be it physically but also emotionally and mentally.

“If it comes down to that...” Alex started, his resolved written in his words and face “I would gladly volunteer to be under his wing if that surgeon insist on Shaun.”

Morgan smirked playfully “Me too, as if I would miss the chance to get to know another surgeon. It’s a bonus experience for me” despite her words, they could all see the glint of sadness in her eyes.

Claire smiled at Morgan “That’s a good idea Morgan, annoy the new surgeon so he would not consider working here” at Claire’s remark Jared laughed a little too loudly and Alex unfortunately choked in his water

Morgan glared at Claire who is smiling at her innocently, soon after Morgan can find herself smiling too “Don’t jinx me, that’s what I plan to do” Morgan playful winked at them

Neil watched with a fond expression in his face, he couldn’t imagine letting one of them go. Neil looked down at his and Shaun’s hands that are still intertwined together, and he thinks that he would be willing to risk everything if it means he gets to be with Shaun forever. He could suddenly feel Shaun gripping his hand a little too tight, but not to the point that it hurts, but rather Neil finds it comforting. So without any second thoughts he returned the intensity of the grip. He could see that Shaun smiled ever so slightly at his gesture. Neil suddenly feels warm at the simple gesture that they share.

Neil wonders if this is what it feels to be with his soulmate, if he ever finds him/her. But Neil pushed that thought aside because it doesn’t matter, he loves Shaun and no soulmate of his could ever change that.

Now that Neil thinks about it... he never did asked Shaun if he has a soulmate mark. His other residents’ tattoos are more or less visible. Claire has a unique outline of the sun that is orange in color tattoo that is located in the side of her neck. Jared has a black shield that has a forest green outline to it, it is located in his shin. Despite having different marks of their body, Jared and Claire didn’t let it bother them as the two of them are already in a 1 year relationship and still counting. Morgan’s tattoo is a simple bow and arrow that is silver and gray in color; it is located right in the middle of her chest. Morgan opened up to them about her soulmate saying that she knows who is it but the guy is already married with kids hence she is glad that her tattoo is very easy to hide. Alex’s tattoo is unrecognizable, but the scars is visible because it is in his upper arm, but they he told them that it was a white feather shaped tattoo. He said that he was sadden by the fact he never got to meet his soulmate but was glad at the same time because he could freely love someone.

A lot of people including his residents are also mesmerized by Neil’s soulmate mark often remarking its complexity and the beauty of the hue of colors blending very well. Neil tries so hard to remember Shaun’s reaction to his tattoo but Shaun just simply looked at it. Never saying a single word or even asking him about it. Neil at first thought that Shaun doesn’t care of doesn’t want to pry, but every time Shaun thinks that he is not paying attention to him, he could feel the intensity of Shaun’s gaze in his tattoo. Neil easily dismisses it with the thought that maybe Shaun just liked staring at his soulmate mark. Neil thinks that if Shaun had a mark, maybe it’s like Morgans’, hidden by clothes. Neil never got the chance to ask Shaun because he deems it too personal of a question. Neil bitterly thinks that whoever Shaun’s soulmate is, they should feel extremely lucky to have Shaun as their significant half. And what Neil wouldn’t do to be the one who has the same exact tattoo Shaun has in his body.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Marcus told them that the new surgeon is already in one of the conference room in the hospital and is waiting for Neil and his residents to show up after eating their lunch. Apparently Marcus already told the new surgeon all about him and Audrey including who their residents are. So in a way, this meeting is just a formal introduction so to speak, and in Neil’s own opinion is an absolute waste of time.

Upon arriving at the front door of the conference room Neil was the first one to open the door and went inside followed by Claire, Jared, Morgan, Alex and finally Shaun. When all of them are finally inside, Shaun closed the door behind him. Upon hearing his door shut Marcus attention has finally turned to them, indicating them to sit down. When Neil was about to sit down he realized that Shaun is still standing close to the door, looking with an unreadable expression in his face at the new surgeon whose attention is still focused in the papers in front of him. Neil and the other resident’s were surprised to see that expression on Shaun’s face, it’s a mixed of sadness, anger and most importantly _guilt_. The tension skyrocketed in the room, Neil immediately stood up and went to Shaun

“Shaun... Shaun are you okay?” Neil whispered. Neil worries doubled when he didn’t get a verbal response. Neil gently nudge Shaun, but still he wouldn’t acknowledge Neil’s presence, but rather Shaun’s attention is completely in the new surgeon.

Marcus is looking at Shaun and Neil with confusion written all over his face, not exactly knowing what is going on with Shaun. Finally noticing the other’s presence in the room the new surgeon turned his attention away from the papers, after a quick glance at the people in front of him he smiles “It’s finally nice to meet you all, my name is Liam Anderson.” 

Liam finally noticed the two presences in the room that he didn’t immediately saw. The moment his eyes landed on the people that are still standing close to the door, his eyes widen so much that Marcus was afraid that it might pop out of their sockets.

“Sh-Shaun...?!” Liam exclaimed hands slightly trembled “You... you are...” Liam composed himself as he suddenly stood up and stride towards where Shaun and Neil are currently standing. But before he could get close, Neil suddenly went in front of Shaun. Effectively blocking Liam’s path before he got too close. Neil could see that Liam didn’t appreciate it, his eyes narrowed as if silently asking Neil to get out of his way. Neil almost scoffed at him, as if Neil would be intimidated by him. Liam might be a half an inch taller than him but Neil’s muscles are more well developed and toned due to years of gym. The two of them glared at which other, no one is saying a single word.

“Could you please get out of my way” Liam gritted out forcibly. Neil knows it’s not a question but rather a silent challenge to him. And well, Neil isn’t the one to back down

Neil smirked condescendingly at Liam “Make me”

Before things could escalate in a very bad way, Shaun gently tugs Neil’s shirt. Neil glared one last time at Liam before turning his attention to Shaun who is now almost leaning into Neil. “I...” Shaun started he let go of Neil’s shirt as he clasped his hands in front of him as an attempt to calm his self down. Neil placed his hand into Shaun’s back as a silent support while still glaring the Liam. After a while Shaun was able to look directly into Liam’s eyes.

“Hello Liam...” Shaun’s eyes darted to the back of Liam’s right hand, where a scar is visible “I... I’m...” Shaun wasn’t able to finish his statement as he saw Liam shake his head

“Don’t... you... it was never your fault Shaun. So don’t you ever dare say that you are sorry when we both know... it was my entire fucking fault” Liam choked out as all the anger disappears from his body only to be replaced by sadness and guilt.

The other people present in the room including Neil are starting to get confused by each passing minute. Different questions raced inside their head as they observed Liam and Shaun’s reaction. Neil’s whole attention was directed at Shaun at this point of the conversation. Neil gently pried open Shaun’s knuckles as it is starting to turn white; Shaun looked at Neil gratefully as Neil held one of Shaun’s hand for comfort.

Liam saw the gesture as his eyes wanders down at their connected hands, Liam’s eyes once again widen ever so slightly he spotted Neil’s lower arm or rather the tattoo that is decorating the said arm. Liam’s head suddenly snapped back to look at Shaun, his mouth gaping ever so slightly as he tries to find words to tell Shaun.

Shaun noticed Liam’s reaction and he immediately sends a panicked look into Liam’s direction. Liam doesn’t seems to notice this, and if he did, he didn’t care to understand it

“Shaun... he is...” before Liam could finish his statement, Shaun suddenly let go of Neil’s hand just so he could reach out to grip Liam’s arms.

Neil was surprised because _never_ did Shaun let go of his hands so suddenly just so he could _touch_ another person. Neil thinks that it shouldn’t hurt this much but.... all he want to do now is hide Shaun behind him so that Liam could not touch, talk and even look at Shaun anymore.

Liam can hear the silent plea in Shaun’s grip in his arms before Shaun immediately removed it. Liam’s thoughts suddenly became clear _on why Shaun is acting this way_. Liam can’t help but chuckled silently and smirked at Neil’s direction.

Neil saw the smirked that Liam is sending his way, and right then and there Neil knows that he wouldn’t like Liam here. _Not at all_. Like Neil knows that Liam would destroy something very important to Neil. _He just knows something will happen_.

Liam walked away from Shaun as he strides back to the table to pick up the papers. He turned his attention to Marcus and the other residents, stopping himself from laughing because of their obvious confusion on what just happened a while ago between him and Shaun. _Interesting_... Liam thought before calling Marcus’s attention

“Well Dr. Andrews, it would be nice working here for a week...” Liam smiled as he glanced at the people around the room before his eyes landed on Shaun. And when Neil saw the way Liam smiles at Shaun, he suddenly felt chills all over him.

Looking at Liam, Neil can’t deny that he has an attractive face with a charming aura to pair with it. Neil never feels insecure because he knows fully well that when it comes to looks, he has one that could attract attention even from afar.

Liam is still looking at Shaun when he said “Especially since... Shaun is here” Liam smirked widen when felt Neil glaring daggers at him, oh he could feel the obvious jealousy and hatred that the other man is giving him. Suddenly an idea popped out of his head, he knows he is risking getting punched in the face but... well he would do this to confirm his own curiosity.

Liam strides confidently towards Shaun, only stopping when he is only an inch away from Shaun. He suddenly gave Shaun a small kiss in his cheeks before looking at Shaun straight in the face once again “I’ll see you tonight Shaun, I’ll just asked Dr. Glassman for your address” Liam then playfully winked at Shaun.

As Liam started walking away from them and towards the door, he couldn’t help but smile as he could feel Neil’s glare even when not looking. _Wow that guy is possessive even when they are still not together_. As Liam closed the door behind him he couldn’t help but chuckled at what fun he would be doing in this hospital for the span of a week. He is sure that Neil Melendez already hates him and well, Liam will make sure it stays that way. He would just explain himself after having his fun with all of them by the end of the week. That is... _if he decides to stay in St. Bonaventure then... maybe he could fool all of them even longer_.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Shaun is wiping his cheeks the moment Liam left. “He never does that” Shaun murmured angrily.

Neil is still looking at the door where Liam left with downright hatred and disdain towards the man. Neil could feel the entire cell in his body heating up and just wanting to punch the smirked out of Liam’s face. Neil knows that he isn’t a violent person, but he could swear that Liam could push all his buttons in all the wrong way. Neil thinks that he won’t ever mind if that guy messed up with him, but he knows that Liam would probably mess up with Shaun. And Neil would make sure if Liam did anything to hurt or disrespect Shaun in any shape or form, Neil is sure he won’t think twice before taking a swing at Liam’s face. _How dare he touch Shaun_ Neil thinks as he watch Shaun who is also clearly wasn’t impressed on what happened a while ago

Sensing Neil’s anger even from afar, Marcus cleared his throat. He could already feel a headache coming up, knowing what he just saw spells trouble or god forbids paperworks.

Even without speaking Marcus already knows what Neil would say “Don’t worry Neil, I won’t let Dr. Anderson be in charge of Shaun” and Marcus knows that’s the right words he said because he could see that Neil slightly felt relief about that. Marcus knows Neil for a long time now, and it’s the first time he saw Neil bluntly shows his disdain for a person. So Marcus needs to thread very lightly when handling this matter.

“I volunteer to be with Dr. Anderson, as if I would let him pick Shaun after that little display” Alex said anger evident in his tone. Alex knows that Shaun doesn’t like being touched let alone _being kissed_ without his permission.

Marcus looked around the room and noticed that the other residents are more or less also angry at what they saw. Marcus gently smiled because he finds it very touching that all of them are looking out for what is best for Shaun, and they would make sure that no one would disrespect Shaun right in front of them.

“That’s alright, thank you Dr. Park. I would inform Dr. Anderson about that” Marcus could see that Neil is gently guiding Shaun to finally sit.

Upon sitting Shaun wasted no time in finding Neil’s hand under the table. Neil smiled as he felt Shaun’s hands intertwined with him once again. Neil could already feel his anger towards Liam slowly disappear. Neil gently squeezed Shaun’s hands resisting the urge to place a small lingering kiss into the back of Shaun’s hand, because unlike Liam, Neil knows what boundaries are and how important those are for Shaun. Neil frowned to himself; ideas are already forming into his head on how he could keep Shaun away from Liam for the rest of the week.

Marcus sighs as he saw Neil’s frown. He knows that Neil is a very rational person. That’s why Marcus is a bit wary about Neil right now, because being friends with Neil for so long this is the first time he saw Neil so protective of someone. After all he knows and also Audrey knows that Neil swore to himself to only love his soulmate, but with how he interacts with Shaun, the way Neil cares for Shaun, Marcus could already see the obvious love that Neil has for his resident. As if Neil’s soulmate doesn’t exist as long as Shaun is with him.

Marcus thinks that it’s going to be a _very long week indeed_.

He just hopes that nothing drastic would happen between Neil and Liam.


	2. Chapter 2

**Super bored because of this quarantine= has a lot of time to update.**

**~o~oOo~o~**

“Knock Knock Shaun! Open up!”

Shaun sighs as he got up to open the front door, he didn’t bother to check who it is because despite what it looks like, Liam does actually know Shaun’s boundaries. So even before Liam could knock on Shaun’s apartment, he already texted Shaun that he would be arriving after Shaun has finished his shift at the hospital.

Upon opening the front door, Shaun immediately stepped aside as Liam takes off his shoes by the front door before continuing inside Shaun’s apartment. Liam casually took a sit in Shaun’s bed, ignoring the disappointing look that Shaun is currently sending his way. When Shaun closed the door, he didn’t bother returning to the bed as Shaun chooses to just stand in front of Liam.

Despite his earlier actions, Liam is actually very nervous but he tries to calm himself down. After all, he is here to settle everything once and for all. He just hopes that Shaun would understand him, and to at least try to rebuild their past relationship. After a while of contemplating and looking around Shaun’s almost empty apartment, Liam took a deep breath preparing himself for what is about to happen.

“First of all Shaun...” Liam forced himself to look at Shaun directly in his eyes before continuing “I’m sorry for everything, and by I mean everything... for leaving all of the sudden without any word from me.” Liam swallowed a lump he suddenly felt in his throat, he refused to get emotional right now as he knows that Shaun deserves at least a proper explanation for everything. “I’m sorry for leaving... for leaving you and Steve”

Shaun broke the eye contact between the two of them, his eyes wanders around his apartment as if delaying his response. But Shaun knows that Liam wouldn’t leave not until the settle everything “When... when you suddenly vanished without anything, not even a single word, my brother... Steve was so heartbroken.” Shaun looked at Liam, his eyes suddenly distant as if remembering something he would rather not “But despite that... he continued to be strong. Refusing to talk about you because he knows... he knows that if he continues to dwell on why you left him, he wouldn’t be able to support me.” Shaun suddenly felt his hands clenched his hand that are on his side, anger suddenly rising at his emotion. “He considered you a friend! He was fine that...you two would stay that way until it’s okay for the two of you to be finally together!”

Liam’s eyes widen at the sudden intensity of Shaun’s shout, he immediately stood up from the bed and went in front of Shaun but he knows that he can’t touch Shaun right now “Shaun please, please calm down” Liam was surprised to see that Shaun is looking at him with so much hatred in his eyes, and Liam thinks he deserves it.

Shaun clasped his hands in front of him as he tries to even out his breathing, he didn’t want the neighbours to complain about shouting that comes from his apartment this late at night. After a while Shaun was able to collect his thoughts and once again he looked at Liam straight in the eyes “How... how dare you hurt Steve like that?” Shaun asked brokenly, tears are starting to pool in his eyes

Liam’s heart broke when he saw Shaun’s expression, how could he not? He could see pieces of resemblance of Steve if he were to look closely at Shaun. This time, Liam was the first one to break eye contact, he hung his head down in shame and guilt that is eating him slowly. “I never wanted to leave him Shaun you know that” Liam suddenly laughed bitterly as he angrily closed his eyes to stop the tears from falling, he doesn’t get the right to cry especially in front of Shaun. It would be like disrespecting Shaun in a way “But... if I stayed... it would never have worked out between me and Steve, you know that. The age difference is too much for me.” Liam suddenly looked down at the back of his hand, the once soulmate mark present there is gone and only a visible scar is there to see.

Shaun’s eyes darted to the back of Liam’s hands; he knows the mark that should be there. Looking at it, Shaun couldn’t stop the few tears that escaped his eyes. Because Shaun is fully aware what Liam’s tattoo was, after all it is the very same one that his younger brother had when he was still alive. So seeing a scar there instead of a small bird that is yellow and red in color, _a mixture of the colors of the sunset_ , a scar was there instead, making the soulmate mark beyond unrecognizable.

“Steve didn’t need you to be his soulmate” Shaun coldly said, looking at Liam directly “He needed a friend, he _needed_ you as _a friend_.”

Liam felt all of his energy leave his body, he suddenly felt tired. Tired and angry, not at Shaun and _never at Steve_ , but rather fate itself. Liam thinks how unfair the world is to him, for his soulmate to be 10 years younger than him. When he met Steve, he was 11, he was 21. When Steve is 12, Liam was 22, they are already best friends that time. Steve was okay with the fact that he would wait a long time before he and Liam becomes a couple. Steve told him that he was just glad that Liam was there to be his and Shaun’s friend, and that he was contented with that because Steve made it clear that his priority is protecting Shaun from their father. And Steve knows that he can’t do that if he and Liam are couple. So Steve was okay with a purely platonic relationship with him. Steve was 13, Liam was 23, he decided to leave without informing the both of them. Liam knows he is being unfair to Steve’s feelings but he just wanted to think, whether or not it is worth it. Liam was 23 nearing 24, when he woke up one day and saw the back of his hand with an ugly scar instead of a beautiful soulmate mark. Liam never cried so hard in his life when he saw the scar, _because he knows what it means_.

He immediately packed a couple of things and returned to where he knows Shaun and Steve _should be._ But he was met with an empty place, as if someone never existed there in the first place. He searched for weeks for Shaun, refusing to believe that Steve died. Liam needed to see truth, refusing to accept the fact that Steve is _dead._ After weeks of searching, he finally saw Shaun together with Dr. Glassman. But no matter how hard he tries, Shaun wouldn’t speak to him and he even refused to look at him. He learned the whole truth thru Dr. Glassman himself, the truth how Steve died. And Liam knows that the moment he heard that, a part of him died too.

Shaun suddenly turned his attention away from Liam, he sat down in his own bed as he looks at Liam’s expression. Shaun knows that he is being a little bit unfair, he shouldn’t blame everything to Liam, because Shaun knows that everything was his fault too. When Shaun finally composed his thoughts “When you left... that’s when Steve needed you the most.” Shaun curled his legs up until he could hug it with his two arms “It’s my fault too you know... why he died. I wasn’t able to do a single thing when he fell off the train.”

Liam once again sat down besides Shaun, still being mindful of Shaun’s personal space. Liam’s eyes stared at the wall in front of him but his eyes seems distant “Steve... he wouldn’t want you to think of that. He wouldn’t want you to blame yourself for his death.” Liam softy smiles as he remembers the limited time he got to spend with Steve “If anything... I’m sure as fuck he is so proud of what you have become Shaun.” Liam turned his head to look at Shaun.

Shaun could see the loneliness, acceptance, and most importantly the sincere smile that is Liam’s sending his way. Shaun smiles too because he knows that about anything else, Steve would want the two of them to become friends again.

“How about this... you can punch me in the face right now as a way of an apology?” Liam laughed as he now knows that everything if forgiven, if Shaun was able to smile at him them Liam hopes that they would rebuild their relationship as friends again.

Shaun huffed at Liam’s obvious joke “No thank you, I wouldn’t want to injure anyone.” Liam’s smiles widen at Shaun’s reply.

“Of course you wouldn’t, you can’t even hurt a fly.” Liam suddenly smirked as he remembers the events from earlier at the conference room “But... I’m sure as hell that your soulmate would take that offer in a heartbeat, the punching me in the face offer I mean”

Shaun suddenly snapped his head to look at Liam who is clearly enjoying his expression right now. “How did you know that he was my soulmate?”

Liam scoffed at Shaun ignoring the way Shaun is frowning at him “I have seen you naked from the waist up like 10 times already, and the size of your soulmate mark isn’t exactly small at all you know” Liam suddenly poked Shaun at the back of his shoulder blades, Shaun swatted the offending finger away “And besides as if I would forget that beautiful soulmate mark of yours, have you seen how the color blends? That’s like a work of art Shaun, it’s a shame that yours is hidden but Neil’s not”

A comfortable silence envelops the room, with Shaun thinking about his own soulmate mark and Liam just thinking how lucky he got because the two of them are finally okay. Liam was the first one to break the silence “He doesn’t know” Liam didn’t say it as a question but rather a statement. When Shaun didn’t bother to reply Liam sighs “Shaun you should at least tell him. And honestly? The way the guy acted earlier like he wanted to slowly kill me I think Neil is pretty much in love with you already, so why not just go with it?”

Shaun shakes his head “We are just friends” Liam once again scoffs at the ridiculous statement

“You two held each others’ hand right in front of me”

“We held hands because we are friends”

“That’s a pretty gay hand holding then”

Liam laughed when Shaun hit his face with a pillow that he didn’t even realize that Shaun is hugging. “We. Are. Friends.” Shaun said with so much conviction Liam would believe him if not for the little display they showed him earlier

“Yeaaah sureee” Liam replied sarcastically as he evade another hit from Shaun’s pillow. Suddenly a plan formed in Liam’s head. Shaun saw the way Liam is smirking and he doesn’t like it one bit

“Don’t worry baby doe” Liam sweetly said, _too sweetly,_ that Shaun felt goosebumps all over his body “If you don’t want to tell Neil, I’ll make sure that he would be the one to confess his feelings for you”

Shaun eyed at Liam warily moving an inch away from him, Liam saw this and he laughed “What are you planning to do? Neil doesn’t like me that way”

Liam softly patted Shaun’s head and before Shaun could swat it away, Liam is already standing up and he picked up the bag he discarded at the front door. He once again sat down in the bed besides Shaun “Don’t worry your little head of yours about that Shaun. You won’t be able to notice what I’m about to do anyway.” Liam opened his bag as he searches from something inside of it “The only thing I’m risking is me getting punched in the face if I went too far.” Liam finally found his toothbrush in his bag.

“Neil wouldn’t hurt anybody” Shaun said as he watched Liam stand up from the bed “He is a very nice and decent person to be with.”

“Yeah sure continue to believe that, after all everybody has their own limits. I’m just gonna test at how far that limit is” Liam didn’t wait for Shaun’s reply as he went inside the bathroom, but before he could close the door he looked at Shaun “Jealousy is a green-eyed monster after all” With that Liam finally closed the bathroom door.

Shaun could hear the water running, he tries to understand what Liam meant with his statement. As he ponders about it, Shaun suddenly realized that Liam would probably spend the night in his apartment. Shaun checked the contents of Liam’s bag and he wasn’t wrong fresh clothes are present inside the bag. Shaun sighs as he knows that he couldn’t kick out Liam now out of his apartment it is very late after all. Shaun smiled at the direction of the bathroom door; he is glad that he reconnected with Liam. After all he thinks of Liam like a brother, he always did help Steve look out for him during those short years the three of them spent together. 

**~o~oOo~o~**

Shaun and Liam arrived a little bit late at the hospital due to Liam’s tardiness every morning. It’s a good thing that Liam drives his own car, or else they would have been very late. Shaun wasn’t able to eat breakfast so that’s why Liam offered him that the two of them first go to the cafeteria to go and get something to eat. Shaun knows that today, Neil and the other residents plans on eating together because there is no scheduled surgery for the whole morning, unless it’s an emergency surgery. He told Liam that fact but Liam just smirked at him and told him that it’s his first official day at the hospital for the week he would be working there so maybe just this once he should join Liam instead of them. Shaun hesitantly agree, after all he gets to eat with them everyday but the time he has with Liam would be limited.

Both of them entered the cafeteria, and the moment they did Liam could already feel Neil’s glare at him. Liam laughed at this and when Shaun looked at him questionably he just smiled at Shaun and told him not to worry about it. Shaun made a beeline towards the table where Neil, Claire, Jared, Morgan, and Alex are already there with their own food. Liam closely followed Shaun, he met Neil’s glare but Liam just sent a mocking smile at Neil. Liam knows Neil can’t do anything to him because Shaun is right between them as of the moment, so Liam can freely taunt Neil right behind Shaun, and that’s exactly what Liam is about to do for the rest of their conversation.

“Good morning everyone” Shaun greatly warmly and just like that Neil’s attention went towards Shaun. Neil smiled at Shaun “Good morning too Shaun”

“I won’t be able to join you all for today, Dr. Anderson... said I should join him for today”

Morgan and Claire looked at Liam with a doubtful expression on their faces, but Liam just smiled at them. Alex narrowed his eyes, suspicious of the way Shaun paused, and Jared just merely raised an eyebrow at Shaun “Then maybe Dr. Anderson could just join us” the moment that suggestion left Jared’s mouth Neil glared at Jared. Jared saw this and raised his arms in surrender mouthing a small ‘sorry’ towards Neil’s direction.

Shaun shakes his head indicating no while Liam is the one who spoke up on Shaun’s behalf “Thank you for the offer Dr. Kalu but... I have an unfinished business with Shaun” 

Shaun frowned ever so slightly from Liam’s statement but before Shaun could open his mouth, Liam immediately cut him off “I mean, we didn’t get to finish what we are talking about last night at your apartment where I spent the night with you” Liam said a little too loudly “Not that I minded that you went ahead and slept first...” Liam subtly looked at Neil who is gripping the plastic fork a little too hard “After all, I get to see your cute face while I watch you sleep the whole night” Finally the fork that Neil is holding snapped in half, Shaun looked at Neil’s hand alarmingly but Neil just threw the now broken fork in front of him looking at Liam with a murderous expression that Liam finds extremely funny. Liam knows that if he were just a common suitor or even a common stranger that is flirting with Shaun he would immediately back down because of Neil. But well, he isn’t so he just savor the hatred Neil is giving him.

Liam looked smugly at Neil before getting Shaun’s attention “Well it’s nice to see you all but we should really eat now Shaun” Shaun frowned but agreed anyway “Oh and Dr. Park, Dr. Andrews has informed me that you will be my temporary resident for the duration that I am here. I’ll look forward with working with you” When Alex nodded at Liam, Liam signalled Shaun that they should get going. And with that Liam and Shaun are gone.

The residents warily looked at Neil, not sure what they should do about the evident sour mood Neil has because of Dr. Anderson. “That fucker” Neil murmured under his breath, and all of them are so surprised because they never heard Neil curse before.

“Do you think that... there is something going on between the two of them? Like... are they dating or something?” Jared suddenly flinched when Morgan kicked his leg under the table. Jared was about to say something when Morgan, who is sitting beside Neil, pointedly gestured at Neil. And Jared knows that his statement isn’t welcomed at the moment. Jared shrink a little bit in his chair when Neil looked at him coldly with a levelled look

“I won’t allow that to ever happen”

At the simple statement all of their eyes widen, because they are expecting Neil to act differently. Like maybe diverge the topic or even refuse to acknowledge the statement Jared had said. But he said it with so much conviction that they are surprised at how Neil is currently acting. Alex, being the braver one in the group decided to confirm what Neil means with his statement

“What are you planning to do exactly with that?” With Alex’s question, Morgan licked her lips in anticipation. All of them leaned a little bit close to Neil, all of them waiting for an answer.

Neil just scoffed a little before giving them a look that they immediately know what it means even without any verbal response. Claire squealed in delight as she suddenly gripped Jared’s arms all too sudden.

“I would make Shaun mine before that fucker can even confess his feelings for Shaun” Neil smirked all too suddenly “And if he did manage to confess before I even got to ask Shaun out, I am confident that Shaun would rather be with me than him anyway.”

Jared can’t help himself but he let out a loud series of “OOHHH” only stopping when Alex hit his head a little too hard for Jared’s liking. Claire reaction is similar to Jared but she refrained herself so instead she repeatedly hit her thighs unable to contain her excitement due to Neil’s boldness. Morgan looks genuinely happy but not surprised, her expression reads “I should have bet money on this, I fucking knew it”, and Alex is looking at Neil with the proudest look he could give to the other man.

“We want details!!!!” Claire suddenly exclaimed unable to hold herself any longer

Neil looked at her questionably, not comprehending what she wants to know. He loves Shaun, he would ask him out, and then Liam could probably just die alone somewhere far from Shaun and him. What’s more there is to know?

His face must have been showing what he was thinking because beside him, Morgan is rolling her eyes “What Claire met is, how long did you realize your very obvious feelings towards Shaun”

Neil raised an eyebrow at Morgan’s statement “ _Very obvious?_ ” Neil repeated slowly

“Yes, ‘very obvious’, did you honestly think that we wouldn’t notice?”

“You are not exactly great at hiding it Dr. Melendez” Jared added as Neil looked at all of them wondering if he could somehow manage to escape his impending interrogation

“Oh I’m sorry Dr. Melendez were you trying to hide your feelings for Shaun?” Alex asked sarcastically as he grins at the dirty glare that Neil is directing towards him

“I...” Neil suddenly felt defensive at everything they just said “It’s not that obvious...” He finished lamely as his composure relaxes, finally accepting the fact that there is no way out of this.

“Okay then! Let’s play a little mini game I would like to call, ‘Did Dr. Melendez said or do things for Shaun or for all of us equally, his very own residents’ winner gets a piece of candy” Claire enthusiastically said, and Neil could already feel the growing dread at the back of his neck

“You really need to work on how you title things” Neil said but was ultimately ignored as all of their attentions are directed at Claire now

“Let’s start with an easy one okay? “I know you didn’t eat, so here is your sandwich and a piece of apple because you shouldn’t skip lunch just to work” any guesses?” Claire saw Morgan grinning widely at where this is all going, clearly enjoying the course of the conversation.

“Pfft that’s easy, of course it’s Shaun.” Jared said without missing a beat on what is currently happening

Neil groaned at this “Hey to be fair I would buy any of you lunch if I had know one of you skips” Jared looked at Neil with a deadpanned face clearly not buying what he just said

“Just yesterday I told you I didn’t had time to get lunch, you just threw me a piece of candy and said to me to “go and buy something in the cafeteria don’t be lazy”.” At Jared’s statement laughter among their table was heard. Alex had the audacity to look at Neil as if saying it’s not use to lie

Alex suddenly put his finger under his chin, pretending to think briefly “Oh how about this, it’s late at night and one of us, not saying its Shaun, missed the last bus for that night. Would Neil offer us a ride or nah?” Alex got choruses of ‘Nah’. Alex grins at Neil’s frustration

“I _would_ literally offer if one of you were in Shaun’s position!” Neil said with so much conviction they almost believed him, _almost_. “And all of you can drive for God sakes! You don’t need someone to drive you around!” Neil suddenly felt the need to add that fact.

“Really?” Alex had the audacity to look surprise “Well my car broke down this morning and I had to get it in the shop and I would be able to get it two days from now, will you drive me back and forth until I get my car?”

Neil narrowed his eyes at him “No, take the bus. You are an ex-cop you can defend yourself”

Alex laughed at him “But Neil... what if Shaun is in my situation? Would you offer him a ride every day?”

Neil knows he can lie, but he also knows that they would see right through him anyway “Shaun is different okay!” Neil could hear his residents laughing at his frustrations “Have you seen him? Shaun is tall but that’s all he could offer, and besides I only drive him if it’s really late at night. I wouldn’t let any sick fuck get near Shaun not that if I could do something about it. And no offense but Shaun is really trusting even with strangers, so who is to say he won’t get in trouble because of his trusting nature”

And while they all agree with Neil’s statement, they still haven’t finished with their point “Okay how about this one time, where he saw someone, again totally not Shaun, sulking for the lack of better term just because the only color of the apple left in the cafeteria are red ones not his usual green ones”

“Okaaay” Neil dragged out “To be fair he was really disturbed by that, so I did any good friend would do, buy him a green apple from the nearby supermarket. I would really do the same for all of you”

And once again he was met with unimpressed stares, Neil thinks that he should really just stop explaining himself all together “Yesterday I told you about my cheetos problem, but you just literally snatched it right of my hand and eat it while you do your paper work” Claire said “You still owe me for that by the way”

Neil rolled his eyes at her, knowing exactly what she was talking about “You would not die Claire if you eat the hot flavoured one. Actually it’s the best cheetos flavour really”

Claire smirked at him “How is this any different from Shaun’s apple problem? I didn’t see you buying me a new one.”

Neil effectively ignored her glare “That’s because...” Neil didn’t had the chance to finish his statement because Jared finished it for him

“Because she is not Shaun we knowww” Neil glared at Jared

“Because you can have Jared do that for you” Neil picked up the handle of the broken fork and threw it at Jared’s direction, pointedly ignoring his protest of ‘hey’

Finally it’s Morgan’s turn “How about the fact that literally none of us has ever been to your house before, but Shaun already has and add the fact that he literally sometimes sleeps over at your place”

Neil looked at her alarmingly “And how do you _know_ that?”

Morgan just shrugged at him before saying “Shaun tells us obviously, and it’s not like you guys are trying to keep it as a secret anyways. We actually thought that you two are dating the first time we heard Shaun said that”

And with that Neil finally accepted the fact that _yes_ he might not be as subtle as he thought he is but really you can’t blame him. He cares for Shaun so much that all he wants to do is to try and make Shaun’s life easier.

“Okay fine, I might not be that _secretively_ but honestly if you guys can see it how come Shaun can’t?” Neil knows he is asking a very stupid question, because he, himself, already knows the answer to that “Nevermind don’t answer it, I know”

“Honestly Neil I find it very thoughtful on how much you care for Shaun that you are showing it thru actions” Claire said as she gently offered Neil a soft smile while the other man returned

“I really hope that you would be the one to tell Shaun about how you feel” Jared said as he looked at Neil directly in the eye “Because I would not want Shaun to date Dr. Anderson no offense. I mean I don’t know him that well personally but I don’t like him, he seems... unreal like too perfect? Sometimes those kinds of people are more dangerous than what you think”

Alex nodded at Jared’s statement “Yeah I wouldn’t easily trust Dr. Anderson with Shaun. But as long as he does nothing harmful to Shaun, I won’t be impartial with my opinion about Dr. Anderson.”

Morgan suddenly gently tapped her finger at Neil’s soulmate mark “What about them?” Morgan asked, and Neil knows that she is talking about his soulmate

Neil glanced down at his soulmate mark “I would choose Shaun over them at anytime” and Neil knows that he said the right thing because Morgan is looking at him with a glint of approval in her eyes

“Though... does any of you know whether or not Shaun has a soulmate mark?” Neil asked as it is the question he is pondering over the last year since he got to meet Shaun

Claire was the one who provided her with an answer “I actually asked Shaun about it, and he said that he has one. It is located at his shoulder blades very well hidden because of his clothes”

Neil didn’t know why but he suddenly felt hopeful _that maybe_ just maybe he could hope that Shaun also has the same soulmate mark that he has. Not that it would stop Neil if ever it turns out Shaun’s soulmate mark id very different from his. He loves Shaun and he won’t let a single tattoo change that.

“Oh! About that!” Jared suddenly exclaimed, all of their attention went to him “I asked Shaun if I could see it just out of curiosity.” Neil leaned forward as he suddenly got intrigued by this new information, Jared looked at him weirdly but decided not to comment on it “He refused saying that it’s inappropriate for him to strip his shirt in a workplace”

Neil can’t help but let out a disappointing sigh escape his lips, he should have knows that Shaun would say exactly that

“Though he did say what it is...” Jared trailed off, this suddenly once again got Neil’s attention

“Well what is it?” surprisingly it was Morgan who insisted not Neil, and Neil was thankful for her

“He said it’s an animal, but refused to say what kind of animal is it. He also described the color of his soulmate mark and now that I think about it... he did say that it’s a combination of different shades of blue”

All of the sudden their attention shifted towards Neil’s own soulmate mark.

“Well i’ll be damned” Alex said laughing at the very high possibility “Imagine if Shaun really is your soulmate”

“How fucking cool would that be” Jared said as he looks at Neil’s expression

Claire suddenly frowned “If that’s the case then... why would Shaun not say anything?”

Silence has fallen upon their table as Claire raised a good point about their topic.

“If...” Morgan hesitantly started “If I were in Shaun’s place, and I knew right from the start who my soulmate is... I would not want them to be with me just because fate says so.” Morgan looked ay Neil directly in his eyes “I would want them to accept me for who I am, I would want them to fall in love with me because they _know_ who I am as a person. And we all know Shaun by this point now, maybe... just maybe he wanted to prove himself before he could talk to you about it.”

Neil silently contemplated Morgan’s words, and he surprisingly agrees with her. And if that’s the case...

“Then... it would be my turn to prove to Shaun that I am the one who could give him everything he could ever want.” Neil smiled at the looks of support that he was getting from his residents “This time, I would make sure that Shaun will be happy together with me, not with that fucker”

He got a chorus of cheerful laughing from his residents, probably from how he cursed. But honestly Neil is so glad he is surrounded by a group of people who supports him just like how he is willing to support them back. He really is lucky to be with them.

“Now that’s the Neil we know! Go and make sure that Shaun would be yours” Alex reached out and patted Neil at his back

“I am seriously gonna cry so sooo hard if you two finally, _finally_ manage to be together” Claire said as she clasped her hands in front of her in an excitingly way of manner.

“Hey I just want to know what happens if you manage to get to confess to Shaun alright? Leave out no details” Jared said in which Claire nodded eagerly

“Never pegged you to be the one who loves gossip Jared, is Claire finally rubbing on to you?” Neil teased at Jared picked up the half of the fork that Neil threw him a while ago, and without any warning, Jared threw the broken half of the fork towards Neil’s direction. In which Neil managed to smoothly dodge it.

“Goodluck with Dr. Anderson, from what we could all tell we think that him and Shaun has some kind of history” as always Morgan never fails to observe the people around her, and Nei is thankful for that especially during this time

“Don’t worry, I’ll tell you all what I know if Shaun would open up to me about Dr. Anderson” Neil promised because he knows that all of them cares for Shaun and only wants the best for him.

“You better do that” Alex said with a threatening tone, but Neil knows it’s not directed at him, but rather at the uncertainty of the situation between Shaun and Dr. Anderson “Anyways, I’ll also try to... casually talk to Dr. Anderson and see what his motives are.” Neil gratefully smiled at Alex’s direction fully trusting him and his words.

With the overwhelming support that Neil gets from his friends, he knows that it’s entirely up to him on how he would approach Shaun with it. Neil doesn’t want to admit it but for the first time in many years, he felt a little bit scared at the prospect that maybe Shaun wouldn’t return his feelings. But Neil knows that he would rather be rejected when he tried to confess rather than see Shaun be happy with someone else and he let his cowardness get the best of him. After all it would also serve as a closure if ever Shaun rejected him. Maybe a chance to finally move on from his feeling for Shaun.

But when Neil remembers all the time he gets to spend with Shaun, and the moments he had with Shaun no matter how small it is or how insignificant it is, Neil knows that deep down Shaun would love him back the way Neil loves him. And maybe, _just maybe_ , Neil hopes that Shaun would choose him rather than his soulmate, just like how Neil would chose Shaun over his own soulmate.

After knowing what Jared and Claire had said a while ago, a glimmer of hope appear in Neil, the hope that maybe after all this time Shaun really is the one for him. That maybe Shaun also has the same soulmate mark as him, and that Morgan was right about everything she said. And Neil could feel his own resolve has finally become steady and firm. And Neil could feel the sudden course of adrenaline pumping through his body as he finally decided on what to do.

Soulmate or not, _**tonight he would confess his feelings for Shaun.**_

**~o~oOo~o~**

**A/N: It’s currently 4:46 am in my country and I can’t fucking sleep so I just decided to finish this chapter instead of writing it for tomorrow. And let me just say that I’m glad I did this as a multi chapters instead of one long ass fic :”D**

**Also very quick poll, should I add smut or nah? Totally up to ya’ll**

**P.s also I lied about one of the tags :”) it would be removed once I posted chapter 3, and new tags are gonna be added and the rating would go up :”D It ain’t gonna be pretty.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: My very first smut yeeey! The rating has changed. Also I hate you Nika2804 for making me write sinful things :”D I will be bathing in holy water after writing this chpater**

**~o~oOo~o~**

It’s been exactly two whole days since Neil had made his decision to tell Shaun how he feels for the other young man. As the days passed by, Neil could feel his patience getting thinner and thinner, and Neil is sure that it would affect the way he works if this continues any longer.

By that he means the constant irritating unnecessary flirting of Liam with Shaun _right in front of him_. Neil doesn’t know what Liam’s motives are but Neil is sure as hell that if Liam continues to test his patience, Neil is seriously in danger of having himself suspended for possible assault. _Not that he would mind that_ , a single voice echoes in Neil’s head.

Neil didn’t even know that he would feel this _hatred_ and _jealousy_ just because another man seems to be interested with the person he loves. Neil knows it is very irrational for him to feel this way because first and foremost he and Shaun aren’t even dating yet. But as Neil looks back for the last couple of years since getting to know Shaun, he couldn’t deny the fact that ever since he started liking Shaun, he got protective of Shaun and his well being. So maybe he shouldn’t feel surprise with what he is feeling right now.

Now that Neil thinks about it, while he did get protective of Shaun, he thinks that the reason he is being _irrational_ with wanting to casually kill Liam in a good sunny day is because it never occurred to him that _someone_ would want to steal Shaun away from him. It’s a fact that despite Shaun being autistic, it doesn’t lessen that Shaun is a fairly attractive person, with his pale white skin, a very great mind, and his insanely attractive eyes. Now that thought has entered Neil’s mind, Neil feels confident that _if he did_ have some competition for Shaun, he is very confident that Shaun would be with him anyways, after all they have come so far. And Neil knows for a fact that Shaun’s heart is heavily guarded, so if any newbie where to have interest with Shaun, Shaun would mostly likely just ignore them.

Neil grins at that one time, a patient around the same age as Shaun has casually said directly that he likes Shaun and would ‘like to take him out on a date’ after recovering from the removal of his gallstones. Shaun just looked at the man like he was asking for a very ridiculous question, before Shaun ultimately ignored the man as he left the room without saying anything. Neil could remember laughing because of the rejected and embarrassed face the man has the moment Shaun left the room. The man looked at him irritably and Neil just raised an eyebrow at him as if saying _‘I’m the one who is going to operate on you, do you really want to continue looking at me like that?’_. After understanding the look on Neil’s face the man suddenly broke eye contact as if embarrassed by what just happened. Neil regrets not taking a photo of the man’s poor face, he knows he is being mean but Neil finds pleasure in the man’s misery. Same feeling he gets when other people shows interest in Shaun just to ultimately get rejected wordlessly. And if anything, that’s just makes Neil fall for Shaun more.

So Neil thinks it’s justified that he feels incredibly jealous of Liam. Because Liam knows how to divert Shaun’s attention away from Neil. Neil is so used to having Shaun’s attention all by himself, so when an another man can have Shaun’s attention other than Neil, he suddenly has the urge to just make Liam disappear so he could fully have Shaun all by himself again.

Because of Liam, the hectic schedule, and the constant interruption, Neil couldn’t find the right time to finally confess to Shaun. His residents are starting to sympathize with him because they all know that it would start to affect his work. Neil could already feel himself more and easily irritated even by the simplest thing or mistake, he has a hard time focusing when reading medical journals. But all of that disappears when Shaun in near him, especially when he is touching Shaun, whether it is a simple brush of their shoulder together and to down right hand holding. Everything feels much better with Shaun beside him, like Neil could do anything as long as he knows that Shaun is there. And now that the mere thought of Shaun being taken away from him is more than enough to make him irrational.

Until know, Neil doesn’t know what Liam’s motives are and why he is interacting with Shaun with that manner. Shaun already told him that Liam and him are just close friends, from childhood but that’s all Neil knows. He trusts Shaun that he is telling the truth but Neil can feel that Shaun is not telling him the _whole_ truth. And with that fact, Neil feels uneasy. Shaun is not lying to him _technically_ , he just doesn’t know why Shaun would withhold the whole truth. Neil doesn’t want to force Shaun into telling him everything, he is not that kind of person who would force Shaun especially Neil knows it would make him feel uncomfortable. He respects Shaun so much that he is okay with what Shaun told him.

Right now Neil is on his way to the cafeteria for his lunch break, he texted Shaun if he is available so that the both of them could eat together. And he is absolutely delighted that Shaun is actually done with most of his work thus they can spend time eating in peace.

Neil just hopes that Liam is dead somewhere in the hospital so that he couldn’t bother Shaun and him.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Alex likes to think that he is a very observant person, after all he is an ex-cop. Two days has already passed since he started working with Dr. Anderson, Alex could honestly say that the man is very passionate about his job. The way he handles his patients with care, and the way the man is laser focus during surgeries. Alex has no doubts that Dr. Anderson is a great doctor, now that he thinks about it Dr. Anderson is like a completely different person when he is in ‘doctor’ mode, that’s how Alex describe him. When Dr. Anderson is with Shaun, he is irritating, loud, and has an arrogant aura in him, and that aura clashes very heavily with Neil’s very own especially when the two of them are in the same room. So it surprised Alex greatly to see this other side of Dr. Anderson, the collected and almost humble doctor, and Alex thinks that Dr. Anderson and Dr. Melendez has some similarities. Both are arrogant, but Alex knows Neil longer than he knows Dr. Anderson, so Neil’s arrogant attitude is justified because Neil is one of the most respected and well-known surgeon in the country. Both are calm and collected during surgeries, the first time he saw Dr. Anderson operating Alex took a double take because he thought he is seeing Neil.

Both of them are great doctors, but it seems like both of them has other personality when it comes to Shaun. When Shaun is near Neil or even in the same room as the other man, Alex could literally feel Neil’s mood and overall aura suddenly becomes brighter. The look at Neil gives to Shaun just conveys pure love, that makes Alex a little bit jealous. Alex could easily say that Neil would give Shaun the moon and stars if that’s what makes Shaun happy. And well Alex thinks that if the two of them are not soulmates, then might as well stop believing in those marks. The two of them are perfect for each other, they balance out each other well, it’s like they were made to make each other feel complete.

However, when Alex observes Dr. Anderson with Shaun, he can’t feel feeling a little bit uneasy with him. Not because of how he interacts with Shaun but... with how Liam looks at Shaun when Liam thinks that no one is looking. Alex could see different emotions swirling in Liam’s eyes whenever he looks at Shaun and the one he doesn’t like is the look of _longing_. It’s very different from the longingness that Neil gives Shaun, because when it’s Neil it is _pure_ like he looks at Shaun as a whole person and he shows that he would love every single cell in his body. But the longingness he sees from Liam’s eyes is distant, like he is just looking at a single aspect of Shaun. Alex could pinpoint the exact reason on why Dr. Anderson looks at Shaun that way, _he doesn’t like it_. Alex decided to at least try to say something to Shaun, because he knows that all he could do know is to protect Shaun from afar because he knows that Neil is more than capable of protecting Shaun himself.

**~o~oOo~o~**

“I know what you are thinking exactly”

Alex diverts his attention at the chart that he was reading as he heard Dr. Anderson spoke. The both of them just finished a surgery and are currently resting in one of the empty corridors both of them are sitting facing each other. It’s already nearing the end of his shift. Alex gave Liam his attention, his face silently asking a question on what he means by that. And Alex could tell that Liam understood the face he was making because he could see Liam smiling sadly. Alex gently placed the chart he was reading in order to directly pay attention to the man in front of him. Silence has fallen between the two of them as Alex looks at Liam, he observes that Liam is trying to compose his thoughts before speaking.

Finally after sometime of total silences, Liam suddenly looked up in the celling as he shrinks back a little in the chair he was sitting. Alex could suddenly feel and see the tiredness sweeping out of Liam’s body. Liam doesn’t make eye contact when he said something that Alex didn’t expect to ever hear.

“My soulmate... is Shaun’s younger brother”

Alex’s eyes has widen when he heard that, not exactly knowing what to say to the other man. Alex looked at the back of Liam’s hand where the other man is slowly tracing the visible scar. It didn’t take Alex a long time before he realized that, that is where his soulmate mark _was_ located. Alex could suddenly feel his heart tightens from the absolute sadness evident on Liam’s face.

Liam looked at him directly in the eyes, the small yet sad smile still decorating Liam’s lip “I... Shaun is the only remaining piece that I have left that reminds me so much of Steve.” Liam chuckled lightly “Shaun looks like him after all.”

At this point Alex is lost for words, he knows how it feels to lose someone who is supposed to be with you until the day you die. Alex might not know the full story but the way Liam looks at his scar, he could already feel the devastating feeling that Liam has right now. Wordlessly Alex stood up and sat next to Liam, he could feel that Liam appreciated that.

“I only got to spend very limited time with Steve. He was so young when I met him, he was just 11 in fact while I was 21. I only manage to have 3 years with him, and those years are the best” Liam looked at Alex “And... I would do it all over again, even though it hurts so much up until now.”

Alex gently patted Liam’s shoulder “My soulmate died before I got the chance to meet them. And while I think that sucks, yours are much more worse than mine” Alex smiled when he saw that Liam slowly smiled at him. “I’m sorry... I really am”

Liam slowly shake his head “It’s no one’s fault. It took me a very long time to stop blaming myself for it.” Liam looked at the back of his hand “Very ironic, the soulmate mark that I had and that Steve had is a bird in the color of sunset. It was a very beautiful soulmate mark, and I... I kinda wish that those soulmate mark didn’t disappear you know? Because if... if I still had mine.... at least I would have a single piece of Steve with me.”

Alex stared at the wall in front of him “Mine too” he whispered silently. A comfortable silence envelops them.

Liam sigh, sounding contented and relax that he was able to tell someone that, not even Shaun knows how he feels. Suddenly Liam smirked at Alex “So... do you think my plan is working?”

Alex gave him a confused look which Liam laughed at the face he was making. Liam waved his hands around “You know the one where I make Dr. Melendez wants to kill me slowly because of my constant flirting with baby doe.”

This time though, it took Alex a while to exactly figure out what Liam is talking about, then it finally clicked in his mind. _He was referring to no other than Shaun_. “What...?” apparently he was still processing it to have a complete sentence out of his mouth

Liam chuckled “Did you honestly all think that I am in love with Shaun?” Liam scoffed at the mere thought “He is like my younger brother for god sakes!”

At this point Alex has already composed his thoughts “So... you mean to say that you just do all of what you are doing to make Neil jealous of you and not because you like Shaun?” and when Liam nodded everything suddenly made sense, starting from the very beginning where Liam kissed Shaun in the cheeks in the conference room in his very first day. “Why?”

Now it’s Liam’s turn to look at him, confused by his question like he thought that Alex should have known by now the answer to his question “What do you mean why? Do you honestly think that I wouldn’t know if Dr. Melendez has feelings for Shaun? He is not exactly hiding it by the way”

Alex laughed at that because they all could see it even from a far “So when you kissed Shaun on the cheeks it is just to see if they are together or not?”

Liam grins nodding his head yes “Honestly I was kind of scared to do that in the first place, because if it turns out that if they were a couple that time, I really think that Dr. Melendez would have punched the fuck out of me.”

Alex laughed and also grins because what Liam is saying is actually quite plausible “Yeah I didn’t think that was a good idea too, although maybe you should lay off the physical flirting because I don’t think that Dr. Melendez could handle it anymore”

Liam sarcastically gave Alex a salute “No promises, I would do anything I have to do in order to get Dr. Melendez to confess first to Shaun.”

Alex looked at Liam surprisingly “Does Shaun like Dr. Melendez?”

Liam snorted at his statement “Like is an understatement to be honest, Shaun is practically in love with him. and I could clearly see that it’s mutual, so to save them the agonizing stage of pinning for god knows how long, I decided to sacrifice myself. Like really, everyday I live in fear of getting punched in the face, oh the things I do for Shaun.”

Alex leaned back in the chair that he was sitting “That’s good, both of them deserve each other.” When Liam nodded in confirmation Alex needed the feel to add “It’s a good thing that their soulmate mark doesn’t let them dictate whom they should love.”

Liam raised an eyebrow at Alex “Are you serious?” Alex looked at Liam questionably, in which Liam replied with an impassive expression decorating his face “Do you honestly think that I call Shaun ‘baby doe’ for nothing?”

Now that Alex thinks about it, Liam actually does call Shaun that _a lot_. The first time they heard Liam called Shaun that, Neil _actually_ broke the coffee mug he was holding. Shaun immediately cradled Neil’s hand checking for any injuries because they all know that Neil has to perform a surgery that day. Neil snatched his hand away from Shaun because the next thing that Neil did was suddenly stood up from the chair he was sitting which caused it to fall on the floor with a deafening sound. They all held their breath in suspense and in nervousness even Shaun looks mildly scared at the expression Neil has. Neil strides towards until there is only an inch between them, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly muttering a low and murderous **“What the fuck did you say”**. And even Alex felt chills and scared on what Neil could do during that time. They all thought that Neil would really punch Liam in the face, him and Jared are ready to intervene. But before Liam could even say anything who is also looking somewhat scared but was able to hide it, Marcus entered the cafeteria together with Dr. Glassman. When Neil noticed them he looked at Liam one last time before deciding it’s not worth it, Neil bumped Liam’s shoulder before exiting the cafeteria. Shaun who must have realized what just happen immediately, went to follow Neil out of the cafeteria. That is actually one of the days that Alex won’t forget. He made a mental note not to get on Neil’s bad side if that’s how Neil is.

Liam knows that Alex must have thinking about the little fiasco that happened between him and Neil because he didn’t wait for Alex’s answer, but rather he just went straight to the point “The soulmate mark on Neil’s arms is the very same one that Shaun has in his shoulder blades. I know because I have seen it personally.”

Alex’s jaw dropped at that “Holy shit... holy shitttt!” Alex couldn’t contain his surprise and excitement at the fact that Liam just casually revealed

Liam grinned at his reaction clearly amused “Holy shit indeed. That’s why I’m making an effort to get those two together” Liam glanced at his scar subtly before adding “Life is too short not to love someone made for you, I would know. That’s why I want Shaun and Dr. Melendez to get their shit together and just be together already, ugh it’s actually getting painful to watched them dance around their feelings for each other.”

Alex grinned at his statement “Preach that, all of us are almost close to betting when are they going to get together.” Alex suddenly sigh, happy that everything would work out for the both of them. He would be very much be happy when Shaun and Neil gets together “I really want them to be happy”

Liam smiled as he covered the back of his hand, looking somewhat distantly “All of us do.”

And somehow Alex knows that Liam is also implying that Steve would want that too.

**~o~oOo~o~**

By the end of the day, Neil feels exhausted. Aside from the surgeries he had to get done for that day, he also attended several meetings throughout the day. So he just wants to go home and sleep his exhaustion away. As he exited the hospital he walks towards the parking lot of the hospital all the while searching for his keys. Just he was about to open his car, he heard voices not far from where he is parked, and he turned his attention away from his car because one of the voices belongs to Shaun. He knows Shaun’s voice even without looking if it really is him. Neil wonders what Shaun is doing at the parking lot, because Neil is fully aware that Shaun first of all doesn’t drive and he doesn’t even have a car.

As Neil turned around he spotted Shaun together with the least person he wants to see for the entire of his life, Liam Anderson. Speaking of him, Liam must have suddenly felt his glare because he saw Liam looking at him before smirking at him. Neil almost had the sudden urge to throw his keys at Liam’s face.

Liam was talking to Shaun when he suddenly felt chills all over his body, and it didn’t take him long to find out who is causing him the sudden tension, and as he expected Neil is glaring daggers at him. Liam smirked at his way before turning his attention back to Shaun who looked confused about his sudden shift of attention.

“Well Shaun it’s getting late, I know you have your day off tomorrow so maybe you should head home now instead of staying here in the hospital” Liam said as he watched Shaun shakes his head

“I still need to ask Dr. Lim about a patient that will be discharge two days from now on, and I find it hard to find time that won’t interfere with her schedule and tonight I think she could spare me some of her time.”

Liam rolled his eyes at Shaun, really he should have known that Shaun is one of those people who doesn’t mind working overtime, suddenly Liam smiled at him and pointed at where Neil is currently standing. When Shaun turned his attention towards where he is pointing, Liam could see that Shaun’s eyes suddenly became brighter and his mood has shift so suddenly the moment Shaun’s eyes landed on Neil. Liam could see that Neil suddenly smiled at Shaun, and Shaun wasted no time as he is now walking towards Neil. Liam decided to follow Shaun, as he would make sure that Neil takes Shaun home.

“Good evening Neil” Shaun immediately greeted the other man

“Good evening too Shaun, do you need a ride home?” Neil offered, he didn’t even bother sparing Liam a single glance totally ignoring his presence.

Shaun frowned ever so slightly “I... have to talk to Dr. Lim about a patient”

Neil couldn’t stop the fond smile that made its way into his lips, because he knows Shaun by now “You could do it the day after tomorrow Shaun, you have the day off tomorrow right?” Neil knows Shaun’s schedule more than his own, when Shaun nodded “How about this, I will take you home then tomorrow I’ll talk to Lim about what you just told me so she could contact you instead of waiting for her.”

Shaun contemplated as he finds that arrangement is much convenient for him. At this moment Liam thinks that Neil should thank him for what he is about to do.

“Well then...” Neil and Shaun’s attention turned back to him “Now that’s settled, how about Dr. Melendez gives you a ride home, just the two of you.”

Neil was quite surprised with what Liam said but he didn’t question the other man “You could stay in my place Shaun, for the night I mean.” Neil was glad that some of Shaun’s clothes are still at his place from the last time Shaun spent the night in his house. Of course like Neil expected Shaun easily agreed with his arrangements.

“I still have to get my things from my locker.” Even without waiting for their reply, Shaun is already walking towards the hospital once again, leaving the two of them behind.

The silence between the two of them the moment Shaun left suddenly felt tense. Neil looks like he doesn’t give a shit that he was there, like Neil is dedicated to completely ignore him. Liam finds that amusing, he decided that it’s no use waiting for Shaun he knows that he could trust Neil with Shaun.

Liam smirked at Neil who is currently looking at him with an impassive face “I gave Shaun a little gift that you would find useful it put it inside his bag earlier, and if you did, don’t forget to thank me.” Neil looked confused with what he just said but Liam just casually left him alone.

As Liam got into his car and out of the parking lot, his phone pinged. He is driving so he could only see a glimpse of what notification he received. And the moment he did he saw that it is a notification from his calendar, his gripped in the steering wheel suddenly tightened, knuckles turning white. He clenched his teeth lips already frowning.

_How could he forget that tomorrow is the exact date where he woke up without his soulmate mark on his skin anymore...?_

**~o~oOo~o~**

The drive to Neil’s house is comfortable and silent, Neil doesn’t mind this because he knows that Shaun would sometimes prefer silence over mindless chatter. Not that Neil minds that because quite frankly he also shares the same sentiments as Shaun. The moment he pulled over his own drive way, as he turned off the engine of his car Shaun is already taking off the seatbelt off of him. Shaun wasted no time as he got out of the car, he waited for Neil to do the same.

They both reached the front door and entered Neil’s house, lights automatically being opened upon walking towards the very spacious living room. Shaun dropped his bags into the floor as he sat down on one of the couches. Neil just watched him, seeing the younger man tired maybe the day is already catching up to him. He shortly joined Shaun sitting next down to him, and as Neil expected Shaun immediately put his head into his broad shoulder. Neil could feel the other man melts beside him. Neil cradled with one of Shaun’s hand, holding it while rubbing circular patterns with his thumbs. He knows Shaun likes it because Shaun admitted that he finds Neil’s touches relaxing unlike when some people touch him.

Bliss and warmth is the only thing the both of them are currently feeling as they savour the moment they both share. Neil thinks that this is the kind of feeling he would want to have for the rest of his life, and he would because Neil knows that only Shaun could provide him this eternal bliss. The two of them would be happy forever and Neil would make sure that he gets to have Shaun by his side, so with small but determined smile he steeled himself

“Hey Shaun” Neil gently called out, he knows that Shaun is still not sleeping so he knows that he could hear Neil just fine. And he was right because Shaun hummed in reply

“I love you...” Neil intertwined his hands with Shaun, Neil loves the way their fingers fits with each other “Go out with me?”

Shaun removed his head from his shoulder as he looks at Neil, eyes widen in surprise, but after a while tears started pooling in his eyes. Neil chuckled as placed a gentle and sweet lingering kiss on his forehead “I... I love you too Neil, for a long time now.” Shaun whispered as he use his free hands to grip Neil’s t-shirt.

Neil used his other free hand to gently wipe the tears that are slowly falling from Shaun’s eyes, his heart bursting with ultimate joy. The joy that he knows that would be impossible to compare to anything else in the world. Because if Shaun Murphy loves him back, then Neil won’t ask for anything else the world has to offer. Neil gently pried his hands away from Shaun’s so that he could use both of hands to cup Shaun’s face gently

“I love you so much Shaun Murphy” Neil said with so much conviction that Shaun could feel the intensity of his words, the love and care Neil is giving him as of the moment. “Be mine and I promise you I will make you the happiest man ever”

Shaun smiled as Neil leaned his forehead against his own “I am yours, since the day I met you Neil. Nobody could ever take your place.”

Neil gave Shaun a small kiss on the forehead, fully understanding the meaning behind his words “May I...?”

Shaun nodded as he turned his back in order to show Neil his shoulder blades, slowly but surely he is unbuttoning his shirt. The moment he reached the final button, he let the shirt slowly fell until it’s exposing his whole back. He could hear Neil take a short sharp breath, and Shaun could feel soft touches tracing his soulmate mark.

“It looks even more beautiful on your skin Shaun” Neil remarks, and he is not lying because of Shaun’s pale white complexion the lighter blues almost looks like they glow against his skin. Neil couldn’t help himself as he suddenly placed a small kiss against Shaun’s shoulder, where the antlers of the deer are placed.

Neil gently covered Shaun up as Shaun faces him once again. Contented smiles decorating both of their lips. Neil wasted no time as he finally leans in close to Shaun, who does the same. Neil felt bliss and love the moment their lips finally, _finally_ , met in probably the best first kiss in history in Neil’s humble opinion. Neil regrets nothing for waiting this long to finally have his first kiss with his soulmate and most importantly with _Shaun_. The way Shaun’s lips locked into his perfectly, the way Shaun grips his t-shirt as a way to stable himself because of the intensity of the kiss they are sharing.

It didn’t take them long to have their tongues involved in their kiss, it started when Neil decided to gently nibble Shaun’s lower lip. Shaun knows what he wants and Neil was instantly given the opportunity to kiss Shaun deeper. Euphoric is what it feels when you are finally kiss the love of your life.

After a while both are in the need to have their breaths catch up, when they separated from the kiss both of them are breathless. An adorable shade of red is decorating Shaun’s cheeks up until the tip of his ears Neil finds it absolutely adorable so he kissed Shaun in the lips once again. But this time it was Shaun who parted away from the kiss, Neil knows he is close to pouting because of it. Shaun gently laughed at his expression.

“Don’t look like that” Shaun said smiling happily as he watch Neil’s expression grew frustrated “We would end up kissing the whole night if I didn’t stop us” Despite what Shaun said he leaned in and gave Neil a soft kiss in his lips, and Neil finds himself soon smiling

“Maybe that was my plan all along, I mean I am totally up for it if you are offering, because at this moment kissing you feels absolutely divine Shaun. I could do this all night” Neil smirked when Shaun gently slap his shoulder the blush on Shaun’s face going into a deeper shade of red.

Suddenly Shaun has a teasing smile that is currently decorated in his lip, and Neil finds it extremely hot. Shaun gently traced Neil’s arms up until his neck, where Neil shivered at the sensation “Or we could do something else instead”

Neil licked his lips as they suddenly felt dry, Neil couldn’t help but warily say “I don’t want to pressure you into doing something you don’t want Shaun.”

Shaun smiled at the way Neil cares for him, Shaun gently cup Neil’s face with his left hands “You are not” Shaun said with conviction that puts Neil’s fears at ease. But still Neil wanted to make sure; he can’t bear the thought if Shaun feels pressured to make love with him. Neil would want that when they do make love, it would be when they are both ready. Neil wants it to make memorable for him and Shaun.

“Don’t you think we are moving to fast? Are you really ready for this Shaun?”

Shaun actually rolled his eyes at Neil in which Neil finds it very endearing “I think 3 years is not too fast Neil.” And well, Neil can’t argue with that. So without any doubts and fear he once again kissed Shaun, this time their kiss turned heated as both of them pours their longingness and love into it.

Shaun could feel Neil’s hands roam around his body, it started in his thighs as Neil slowly made his way up until his hips where Neil rested his hand on his sides. That is when Neil decided to start leaving trails of gentle kisses in Shaun’s neck. When Shaun tilted his head to the other side to give Neil more access to his neck, that’s when Neil started to suck and bite every part of his skin that Neil’s lip touched.

Neil could hear Shaun’s soft moans as he continues to leave marks all along his neck up until his shoulder; Neil is making sure that everyone would see that Shaun _finally_ belongs to him. Neil didn’t think he would be the possessive type but here he is, leaving dark marks of hickey all over Shaun’s neck. Deciding that he is now contented that even Shaun’s work clothes can’t cover it all up, Neil leaned away from Shaun’s neck that has an astounding amount of hickeys varying in sizes and shades of darkness.

Neil decided that he doesn’t want their first time to be in the couch, he knows Shaun deserves more than that “How about... we take this to the bedroom instead?” Neil suddenly frowned, he could feel an headache coming up “Shit...” He murmured quietly

Shaun suddenly felt worried, Neil gently kissed him before saying “I... I didn’t prepare for this, we can’t do this without lubes and condoms Shaun, I don’t want to hurt you.”

Neil didn’t know why but Shaun suddenly once again blushed and he wordlessly pointed at his bag, Neil’s eyebrow furrowed as he went and open Shaun’s bag. Neil noticed a simple black pouch that caught his eyes because he knows that it doesn’t belong to Shaun. He picked it up and opened it, and was met with a surprising contents. Just exactly what they needed. He turned his head to Shaun in wonder who is currently not meeting his eyes.

“L-Liam is the one who put it there, he thinks I wouldn’t notice”

Suddenly the conversation in the parking lot made much more sense now. Neil grins, and thinks that maybe he could forgive Liam someday just because of this. Neil move backs to Shaun and without saying anything he made Shaun hold the pouch, Shaun was about to say something but was stop because a surprise squeak escaped his lips when Neil all to suddenly carried him. Shaun was forced to wrap his legs around Neil’s waist and arms around his neck as Neil effortlessly support all of Shaun’s weight. Neil then walks towards the stairs, and while Shaun finds it absolutely hot being manhandled like this he wonders if Neil could actually go up the stairs all the while carrying Shaun

“If you drop me, we are never ever having sex ever again. I’m serious.”

Neil laughed at that, he then once again started kissing Shaun, easily slipping his tongue inside of Shaun’s mouth as both of them once again becomes absorb with the intensity of the kiss. Shaun didn’t even noticed that they arrived in the bedroom

Neil slowly and gently placed Shaun into his bed, Neil finds Shaun absolutely ravishing. He looked at Shaun’s already reddening and swelling lips due to the intensity of their kiss from earlier down to his neck and shoulder covered with hickeys up until Shaun’s already exposed body. Neil licked his lips in anticipation and want.

Shaun watched as Neil removes his t-shirt before climbing on top of him, Shaun let his hands wander all over Neil’s well-toned body, he gently slides his finger into Neil’s defining abs up until his finger reached Neil’s well defined shoulder. Shaun thinks that Neil looks absolutely gorgeous, like a Greek statute.

Both of them locked eyes, smiling to one another softly. They both know that they don’t need to rush anything to night. Tonight is all about them and no one else. So they shared a slow passionate kiss trying to convey everything they feel towards each other.

When they separated both are breathless. Neil went down as he started slowly kissing the base of his throat leaving a hot trail of kisses up until Neil reached his chest where Neil gently licked the pink nubs while he slowly rubs the other one in between his finger.

Shaun couldn’t stop the moans that escape his lips, as he feels stimulated by what Neil is currently doing to him right now. He felt Neil kiss his stomach until he reached his already hard cock that is still being restricted by his pants.

“Take them off...!” Shaun whines wantonly

Neil finds it extremely hot that he gets to see this side of Shaun, _only he could_. Without any second thought clouding his mind, he gently unzips Shaun’s pants and tugged it off him including his undergarment. Neil carelessly tossed the now discarded pants somewhere behind him, at this point Neil doesn’t care about anything else except making Shaun feels so good that he would forget even his owns name.

Neil wasted no time he immediately wrapped his hands around Shaun’s cock, pumping it gently. Neil uses Shaun’s pre-cum as a lubricant to ensure that he could pleasure Shaun properly.

Shaun could feel that he is losing his mind to the frenzy of lust combined with pleasure from how Neil makes him feel. He could once again feel Neil licking and kissing his chest and right then and there, Shaun could feel the tension build up inside of him from the extreme pleasure he is experiencing.

“Ne-Neil... I a-aah... close... so close...hngg...” Shaun finds it hard to speak coherently, all he could focus on is Neil.

Neil suddenly stop everything that he is doing, Shaun glared at his, eyes clouded with lust and unshed tears from pleasure. Neil softly chuckled at Shaun’s expression, he kissed Shaun’s forehead as Neil tries to distract him so he could open the sealed lube.

Shaun watched as Neil pours a generous amount of lube into his fingers coating two of them. Some lube dripped into his stomach and he shivered because of the cold sensation.

Neil kissed Shaun in his lips “Are you ready?” Neil whispered as he position his finger near his entrance. When Shaun nodded he could feel a poking sensation in his entrance until he could feel it inside of him.

Shaun gripped the bed sheet beneath his fingers at the intrusion in his entrance. At first he felt pain from being entered even by Neil’s finger but when Neil started to slowly push it and out of him; he could feel pleasure building up as Neil fasten his actions.

“S-shit! A-ah!” Suddenly Shaun let out a loud moan when he felt Neil’s finger curled up inside of him “Wh-wha...?” at this point Shaun is breathing heavily 

Neil smirked above him seemingly understanding what Shaun meant, Neil once again curled his fingers at the exact spot where he finally found Shaun’s sweet spot “Found it” Neil truly enjoys seeing Shaun this way. Every moans, every pant he produces, and the face he is making everytime Neil would tease his sweet spot, all of it belongs to Neil. With just that thought swirling in his mind, Neil knows that he is hard and his pants are starting to get tighter.

“Neil... I want you... please...” Shaun grab Neil by the neck to initiate a wanton kiss that made Neil immediately withdraw his finger’s from inside of Shaun.

Neil slowly unbuckled his belt and tossed it on the side, it was soon followed by his pants until like Shaun, he is completely naked.

Shaun’s eyes wanders at Neil’s very own cock, and he felt excitement and a little bit of fear bubble up inside of him. Neil is for the lack of better term... huge. Shaun watched with lustful eyes as Neil coats his hard cock with generous amount of lube, he saw that Neil was about to grab a condom from the pouch, but before he could Shaun stop him from doing so.

“Let’s...” Shaun suddenly feels embarrassed but “Let’s do it... without the condom I mean.” Shaun could see that Neil’s eyes widen at his suggestion, his mouth opening and close as if no words could form.

“O-okay... if that’s what you want Shaun”

Neil could feel his self-restrain being tested when Shaun said he wanted to do it raw, he want to just push his cock in Shaun’s entrance and pound in him until both of them are wrecked or until he knows that Shaun won’t be able to walk for at least a day. But Neil knows he should be patience, it’s their first time after all. He would have all the time in the world for different kinds of sex later on, but right now he wants it to be perfect.

Neil placed his bare cock near Shaun’s entrance, poking it and rubbing the tip of his cock in Shaun’s entrance, but never pushing it. He looked at Shaun, leaning his head near Shaun’s ears “Are you ready?” he whispered

When Shaun nodded, he could feel the sudden intrusion in his entrance. But this time something much bigger is entering him, his eyes shut as he could feel Neil already halfway inside of him “H-hurts... w-wait please...” tears started slowly escape Shaun’s eyes

Neil immediately stop but didn’t remove his cock that is halfway inside of Shuan, he intertwined his one hand together with Shaun, making extra sure that he won’t suddenly make any movement so he could give Shaun time to adjust to his length. He could feel the tight grip in Shaun’s hand that is laced with his own, he slowly kissed Shaun’s forehead. “Please bare with it, I’ll make you feel good I promise. I would never hurt you Shaun, I love you so much.” He started placing small kisses into Shaun’s face until he could feel Shaun calming down again.

Shaun nodded looking at him directly; Neil knows that he could move again. As gently as he could, he pushed the rest of his cock inside of Shaun. He almost cums from the hotness that is enveloping his whole cock. The hotness from Shaun and the feeling of his raw cock is euphoric for Neil. Being inside Shaun is one of the best feeling he has ever experienced.

Shaun moaned when he was able to finally take all of Neil’s length inside of him. Being full with Neil’s cock and the tenderness and love Neil is giving him during sex is something Shaun could easily see himself being addicted to.

“You... you can move now please” After adjusting and feeling the pain from earlier subsides Shaun thinks it would be a good time for Neil to finally started moving

Neil nodded and he slowly let his cock move inside of Shaun, they are experimenting on the rhythm they want to settle in. Shaun feels that he can’t get enough of Neil “F-faster please Neil...” Shaun almost begged, and when Neil started to pound on Shaun, Shaun’s moans grew louder and louder with each time Shaun could feel the whole length of Neil’s cock right inside of him.

Neil suddenly put one of Shaun’s leg up in his shoulder all the while still thrusting in and out of Shaun, because of the change in position, Shaun could feel another different pleasure coming up to him, as he could feel Neil’s cock assault the sweet spot inside of him. At this point Shaun is already screaming and moaning Neil’s name, making Neil thrust harder and faster.

“Sh-Shaun... Sh-shit you feel so good...” Neil bites Shaun’s leg as he can’t reach Shaun because of their position right now. Neil doesn’t mind because he would leave marks all over Shaun’s body. “I... love you so much Shaun” Neil silently moaned and his breath hitched when he felt Shaun tighten around his cock. He knows that they are both close to reaching their climax.

“Ne-Neil...hnggg.... I’m... close” Shaun knows that the way he gripped Neil’s arms for support would probably leave a mark but right now all he could care about is the fact that he is close and it would be only a matter of time before he cums untouched. The pleasure coming from Neil is more than enough to make him cum.

Suddenly Shaun moaned loud as Neil watch Shaun cum, he could feel Shaun tighten all of the sudden around his cock causing Neil to let out a shuddering breath as he cums inside of Shaun. Neil felt Shaun’s leg falls from his shoulder as Neil is careful to not crush Shaun with his weight. Neil supported himself as he could still feel himself cumming inside of Shaun.

Shaun could feel the sudden burst of hot liquid inside of him, he knows that Neil wasn’t able to withdraw in time, not that Shaun minded. After all Neil cumming inside of him is one of the things Shaun wants to feel. Shaun knows that some of Neil’s cum are leaking outside of him but he doesn’t care because he still hasn’t collected his bearings yet.

Neil carefully withdraws his cock and the moment he did, his cum slowly leaks out of Shaun’s entrance. He fell beside Shaun, as the younger man immediately closed the distance between them. Neil smiled as he kissed Shaun’s sweaty forehead, Neil covered both of their naked body with the comforter.

“Shaun you are amazing, I love you so much” Neil gently sweeps the hair that is covering Shaun’s eyes. Shaun smiled at him hugged Neil tighter

“I love you too, thank you for being gently with me. That was amazing” Shaun suddenly flicked Neil in the forehead “You would help me tomorrow morning, it feels very uncomfortable right now.” Shaun’s eyes started to slowly drop from exhaustion

Neil chuckled “Well you wanted to do it raw” Neil placed a soft kiss on Shaun’s lips as he watch the younger man struggle to stay awake “But don’t worry I will take care of you tomorrow and forever”

Shaun smiled at him one last time before surrendering from exhaustion, within minutes, Shaun is already fast asleep safe and loved in Neil’s arm.

Neil buried his face into Shaun’s hair as he hugs Shaun even tighter, savoring the moment that he finally has Shaun for himself, and he intends to keep it that way for forever.

In the middle of the night, with Shaun right between his arms, safe, contented, and most importantly loved, Neil whispered a small sincere thank you for letting fate make him the one who gets to grow old with Shaun, to love him for the rest of his life. As he watches Shaun sleeps, Neil thinks of various ways to make Shaun happier than he ever did.

_Because he knows that Shaun only deserves the best of what he has to offer._


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I acquired a new hobby thus keeping me from updating peaceee. I don’t know how many chapter I have left for this fic.**

**WARNING READ THE NEWLY UPDATED TAGS! ATTEMPTED RAPE for this chapter!!!**

**~o~oOo~o~**

It’s still 5 am in the morning when Neil’s phone alarmed. He opened his eyes while groaning at the loud noise early in the morning. After turning off the alarm, Neil looked down in his chest where Shaun is still sleeping soundly. Neil smiled warmly as he leaned down to kiss Shaun’s head, his hands gently caressing the bare back of Shaun. After a while he could feel Shaun starting to stir awake. Neil waited patiently as Shaun finally opened his eyes blinking the drowsiness away as he looked at Neil directly in the eyes.

Neil leaned down to place a tentative kiss on Shaun’s nose “Good morning Shaun”

Shaun smiled and snuggled closer to Neil, hiding his face into Neil’s chest “Good morning too Neil”

As much as Neil would like to spend the rest of the day in bed together with Shaun, he knows he can’t because of the busy schedule he has for today. So Neil regretfully sighs “I have work today Shaun”

He could feel Shaun nods “I know, you should prepare.”

Neil slowly sat up as Shaun does the same, both of them rubbing their eyes to remove the remaining drowsiness. As Neil got up from the bed, he could see Shaun frowning, Neil laughed at him softly as he knows why is Shaun like that

Shaun glared at him “I’m sore and uncomfortable right now.” Shaun pouted as Neil continued to laugh at him “You better help me or I swear we are never having sex again Neil”

Neil finally stop laughing as he gently leaned forward to kiss Shaun in the forehead “I would help you, no need to threaten me Shaun.” Neil gently placed his arms under Shaun’s thighs as he hoisted Shaun up effortlessly; carrying him bridal style as they venture to the bathroom that Neil has in his room.

“Am I heavy?” Shaun asked as he wrapped his arms around Neil’s neck, completely trusting him that he won’t drop Shaun

Neil couldn’t help himself as he nuzzled Shaun’s cheeks placing a small kiss into it “I have carried something heavier than you Shaun, so no you are not.” He could see Shaun blushed it him “Though you really need to start eating Shaun, I’m worried at how light you are.”

Upon arriving at the bathroom Neil’ gently set Shaun down into the edge of the bath tub as Neil started to run the water to fill it up. Constantly checking the temperature. Shaun eyes widen as he stares at himself in the mirror in front of him. Aside from being naked Shaun could see the various of marks that he has all over his body starting from his neck down to his legs where there are bite marks. Shaun slowly blinked trying to form words he could say to Neil, who is still busy making sure that the water is well heated.

“Neil...” Shaun started, Neil looked at Shaun “How... how am I going to hide all of this...?”

Neil himself looks unsure “Do you want to hide them?”

Shaun shook his head, smiling at Neil’s direction “No, it’s fine.” They both shared a sweet soft kiss “Though if Dr. Glassman sees this better explain yourself to him.” Neil could see Shaun smirked at him

“Shit...” Neil murmured silently but was heard by Shaun anyway.

When the bathtub is finally full, Neil check the temperature and once he finds it suitable, he gently helped Shaun get inside of the bath tub. Shaun quietly hissed in pain when the warm water hit his while body especially his bottom. Neil pressed a soft kiss into Shaun’s temple as a way of saying sorry.

Neil grabbed the shower head that was near the bath tub he let the water run until it got to his preferred temperature. It’s a good thing his bathroom is very spacious so it can accommodate one large bathtub and another separate shower head. “How are you feeing Shaun?”

Shaun looked at him “I’m sore but it’s okay, last night was amazing”

Neil chuckled at his statement “You are amazing.” Neil gently lathered the shampoo in his hands, seeing all foamy he gently washed Shaun’s hair massaging the scalp the best he could. He could see Shaun close his eyes blissfully, while humming softly. Neil then rinsed of the shampoo using the shower head that he prepared. As the shampoo comes of he handed Shaun a shower puff scrub as Shaun gratefully accepted it.

Both of them continued with their shower quietly as they know they are happy and contented with it. After a while both are ready to get out. Neil helped Shaun get out of the bath tub and putting on their robes. This time instead of carrying Shaun out of the bathroom, Shaun insisted that he could walk albeit in need of assistance from Neil. Both of them got dressed. Neil is preparing for work while Shaun needs to return to his apartment. Suddenly Neil thinks about how he wants to wake up next to Shaun everyday for the rest of his life

“Shaun...” Neil waited until Shaun in looking at him instead of his cellphone, seemingly scrolling through messages “What do you say to the concept of living together? Making this our home?”

Shaun smiled brightly at Neil, as Neil stride towards the bed where Shaun is seated. Neil kneeled down placing both his hands on Shaun’s knees

“I would love that” Shaun smiled as he leaned his head towards Neil, pressing their foreheads together

“And I love you Shaun” Neil and Shaun shared a soft kiss breaking apart after a few second, both are aware that Neil needs to work “Thank you for making me happy”

Shaun gently caressed Neil’s face “Thank you for being with me.”

Neil and Shaun shared one final kiss as Neil knows that he can’t be too late to work for today. After assisting Shaun down and into the car, Neil drove off to drop Shaun into his apartment. After dropping Shaun, he promised the younger man that after his shift he would help him pack his staff as they both decided to move in together as soon as possible. He promised Shaun that he would pick him up to have their very first official dinner date as a couple. Neil drove off in Shaun’s apartment the moment he assures himself that Shaun would be okay, smiling the whole way towards the hospital. Neil knows that nothing can destroy his good mood for the rest of the day. He can’t wait to tell everyone he knows that he and Shaun are officially together.

**~o~oOo~o~**

It was exactly 7 am in the hospital where the residents are currently having their breakfast before doing all of the works that are assigned for them. It was exactly 7:10 am when they saw Neil entering the cafeteria. All of them immediately stop what they are doing, as they stare at Neil who is striding towards them. Jared who had his have eaten sandwich midway toward his mouth, quietly lowered it before looking at Alex who is in front of him

“It’s 7 am why is he looking so happy?” Jared asked as he was met with shrugs, they are all aware that Neil isn’t exactly a morning person especially if he did had a couple of cups of coffee beforehand.

Suddenly all observe Neil as he sat down, a genuine smile and a happy aura all over him. Neil finally noticed the stares that are directed towards him, he gave them a questioning look but the smile never left his lips “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” Neil asked hoping for an answer

“Are you high?” Alex asked seeing as that is the only plausible question he could utter. They are all so used to Neil being grumpy during morning shift, even more so when it’s Shaun’s day off which by the way is today.

“Is...” Claire for her part seems hesitant “Did... did you finally kill Dr. Anderson...?”

Alex snapped his finger at her “Aha! That’s a more plausible explanation on why is he looking so... ‘that’ early in the morning”

Neil rolled his eyes at them but his smile never disappearing, it’s like it’s forever plastered in his lips. But before he could explain his side Morgan suddenly made a remark

“Wait what happened to your arm?” Morgan suddenly exclaimed as all their attention turned to his arm that for all purpose, are full of scratches and marks of fingernails. Neil looked at them smugly, like he was proud of the marks. _He really is because they should see the marks he left on Shaun._

“Shaun and I are finally together” despite the simple announcement, Neil’s smile has significantly widened.

All of them looked at Neil in shocked, mouths open and close as none of them had expected it. They all talked about it and they think that it would take Neil months before having the courage to ask Shaun out.

“Fucking finally! We are all free of the pinning show starting Neil Melendez together with Shaun Murphy! Praise the Lord!”

All of them laughed at Jared’s statement but all of them looked genuinely happy for Neil and Shaun as they all know just how much they care for each other. Claire suddenly looked excited as she turned her attention to Neil once again

“So how did it happen? We want the complete details leaving no information out!”

Neil looked at her “You really don’t want to learn _all_ of the details trust me” not that Neil would disclose the very passionate night he and Shaun shared, because despite being proud and happy that he and Shaun are together, all of the intimacy Neil saw and experienced with Shaun _are for his only_. No one has to know just how intoxicating Shaun is during sex. “Long story short, I invited Shaun to sleep in my house because it was already late at night, I confessed because the mood seems right. He showed me his soulmate mark, which by the way is very beautiful against his skin complexion. He felt the same way and... yeah that’s pretty much it.” _It really isn’t_

“And? Do you two have the same soulmate mark?” Morgan looked really curios as well as Jared and Claire

Alex raised his eyebrows at them “Of course they do.”

Neil together with Claire Jared and Morgan looked at Alex with a surprise expression on their faces “How did you know that?” Neil asked

Alex’s lip thinned, he forgot that it was supposed to be a secret. But Alex knows that he can’t lie to Neil, because the man also knows if a person is lying to him or not. And well Alex doesn’t want to be on Neil’s bad side “Dr. Anderson told me”

Neil suddenly looked impassive, clearly not amused by what he said “And how would he know that?” Neil asked darkly.

Alex knows he should be careful on how he would explain this because right now Neil isn’t exactly happy by the turn of events. “I’m just going to tell you what Dr. Anderson told me but you can’t get too mad okay?” Neil just raised an eyebrow at him and gestured for him to continue “So Dr. Anderson told me that he and Shaun are actually friends from waaaay before. We are talking years. Dr. Anderson told me that he and Shaun are friend when Shaun is just 12 while his brother Steve is just 11.”

Neil hummed so Shaun didn’t lie to him but didn’t told the truth either. Neil was about to say something but he could still see that Alex would still say something but is seem so hesitant “Well? That doesn’t really answer my question. Shaun’s soulmate mark is located in his shoulder blades and frankly Shaun would need to get at least half-naked for people to see his soulmate mark.”

Alex is hesitant to tell them what he knows; after all he knows that it isn’t his place to disclose this information. He didn’t even know if this is supposed to be a secret and not a common knowledge. Having a scar instead of a soulmate mark isn’t exactly embarrassing but some people would rather have it a secret. After a couple of minutes of complete silent, Alex sighed in defeat, he didn’t really want to get on Neil’s bad side. And besides he completely trusts all of them, Alex knows that they are not the type of people to gossip “...Shaun’s younger brother, Steve.... is Dr. Anderson’s soulmate....”

All of them had a flabbergasted expression on their faces. They all know what happened to Shaun’s brother Steve and how exactly he died. Suddenly a dawn of understanding is shown in Neil’s expression.

“Dr. Anderson told me the reason he acts that way towards Shaun is to make you feel jealous so you would make the move to ask Shaun out. He said that life is too short for pinning or something close to that.” Alex leaned back in his chair “Right from day one he already knew that you are Shaun’s soulmate, he is just worried that Shaun would never say it to you so he made move instead.”

Now that the truth is known, Neil feels like an asshole. But not really, because first of all he didn’t _really_ did anything to Liam physically. And he didn’t know that Liam had that kind of motives, Neil genuinely thought that Liam likes Shaun and he would take Shaun away from him.

“That’s... really ballsy for him” Jared slowly said, having to witness how Neil controls himself everytime he could see Neil wanting to punch the shit out of Liam everytime they are together. “I mean... I wouldn’t do that” Jared shivered at the thought of him being on the wrong side of Neil, he didn’t really want that. Because he knows that Neil didn’t need to get physical to be scary when he wants to be.

Claire nodded seemingly getting over the information that was just said to them “I really wouldn’t also do that.”

“So does this really mean that Dr. Anderson is just really messing with Neil?” Alex nodded at Morgan’s direction. Morgan smirked “Well then I think you owe him a drink or something Neil.”

Neil cringe at her suggestion “What? No way.” Neil crossed his arms “It’s his fault and for the record I never did anything to him physically, if anything he owes me not the other way around.” Neil scoffed

All of them laughed at Neil, they are now familiar with Neil’s pride and arrogance so it’s pretty much understandable now. Morgan suddenly titled her head ever so slightly “So what happened to your arm? Did you get into a fight?”

All of the sudden Neil smirk, a smug look in his face “You really don’t want to know”

Morgan raised her eyebrows at him “I really do”

Neil scoffed he knows that they won’t stop asking until he said what happened so might as well say it “Shaun.”

All of them looked at him questionably, not understanding how the scratches is caused by Shaun. Neil laughed at them, enjoying the pure confusion on their faces. “Shaun did this to me.”

Claire made a face of disbelief “Why would Shaun hurt you? I mean you two did get together right?”

Jared nodded at her “Did you two already have a fight the moment you two got together?”

Neil rolled his eyes at them for a couple who has sex almost everyday they can be really slow when it comes to this kind of things. Or maybe it’s because they never did a number of marks with each other just like how he gave Shaun an insane amount of hickey likewise the scratches and nail marks on Neil’s arms and back.

Alex suddenly facepalmed, seemingly understanding everything he is seeing and hearing. Right beside him Morgan clocked her tongue, also realizing what Neil is implying.

“They slept together geniuses” Alex said sarcastically just wanting this conversation to end quickly. Neil was right he didn’t really want to know

Morgan seems to agree with his sentiments with regards to the topic “Yeah, I didn’t really want to know.” She pressed her head into the cold surface of the table, not wanting to have mental images of Shaun and Neil doing it. She wants Shaun to remain pure and innocent in her mind thank you very much.

Claire and Jared had their mouth open and close seemingly having a hard time forming words “ALREADY?!” Claire shouted, earning a couple of glance with other people who are in the cafeteria. She looked at the saying a quite sorry to everyone.

Jared eyed the scratches and nail marks on Neil’s arms “Damn... like how... just how?” Jared flared his hands around seemingly lost for the right words.

Neil smirked at him he understood what Jared is trying to say. “It’s **that** amazing.” Neil’s expression soften “Shaun is amazing”

Claire laughed “Way to go Dr. Melendez. But please spare us the details, we really don’t want to know”

Neil laughed at them “I already told you that but you won’t listen to me.”

“So does it hurt? The scratches I mean, because it honestly looks painful to me.” Jared said as he looks at the still red scratches that Neil has.

Neil shook his head “It doesn’t and honestly it doesn’t compare to the amount of marks I left in Shaun.” Neil looked at them with pure satisfaction in his face “It would take at least _weeks_ for them to disappear”

All of them cringe at Neil’s statement, they are just thankful that today is Shaun’s day off so they really won’t have to see it until tomorrow. 

“Okay! We are done with this topic!” Alex seems desperate to change the topic “How is Shaun and where he is right now?”

“He said that he wanted to return to his apartment.” Neil leaned back as he recalls the moment they both woke up “We are actually planning on moving in together” Neil smiled

All of them looked happy with the news, they are not surprised at all because they all know how much both of them needs each other. So it’s no surprise that they would immediately want to be together. 

“Is there anything we can help with?” Alex asked

“Actually yes, you could help me and Shaun move couple of his things. Like his clothes and some books. He doesn’t really have much.”

Alex nodded “It’s a good thing that our shifts would end exactly at the same time, unless Dr. Anderson would make me go overtime.”

“Speaking of which, isn’t Dr. Anderson supposed to be in today?” Jared asked, he looked at his watch and saw that it’s already quarter to 8.

Neil also glanced at his watch, remembering that he has an 8 am meeting with Marcus about the sponsorship even that would happen at the end of the month. Neil stood up, as his resident already knows his schedule “Well then, I better get going. As much as I want Marcus to suffer by waiting for me, I’m not really in the mood to handle one of his tantrums.” And with that Neil left the four of them.

Alex fixed his tray “I should also get going, wouldn’t want Dr. Anderson to wait for me, wherever he is.” Alex left hoping to see Dr. Anderson immediately so he could start his shift

The three that was left in the table all looked at each other as they shrugged, they know that the three of them have some scut work and paperwork to do but it wasn’t urgent so they decided to relax for a little bit before separating ways to do their assigned works to them.

**~o~oOo~o~**

The moment Neil opened the door to Marcus’s office, Audrey is already there. The both of them looked at Neil with a surprised expression on their faces, Neil looks at them in confusion as he sat down in front of Marcus’s table where the other man is still staring at him

Finally Neil had enough of their silent judgement “What? Why are the both of you looking at me like that?”

Audrey looked at her wrist watch then glancing back up to look at Neil “You... you are 5 minutes early”

Marcus nodded his head as he glanced at the clock right by the side of the door “Are you feeling well Neil? Are you...” Marcus eyes him warily “Are you high?”

Neil facepalmed and sighed already regretting being in Marcus’s office early in the morning “Why are people asking me that? I’m a doctor; I’m not going to ruin my career by taking drugs!”

Audrey and Marcus looked at one another before turning their attention back to Neil “Then why are you here so early Neil? Because honestly we are expecting for you to not even show up.” Marcus nodded in Audrey’s statement. His lack of trust in Neil completely showing.

Neil rolled his eyes at them “I was actually planning on talking to Marcus about something before the meeting about the sponsorship event.”

Marcus wordlessly gestured for him to continue “Should I be here? This sounds serious” Audrey asks already reading herself to exit the office, but Neil just shook his head no making Audrey relax once again in her chair.

“I’m going to need to sign the HR form about the rules and guidelines when it comes to dating a work colleague” Neil decided to just get straight to the point.

Marcus and Audrey creepily looks at him while the two of them processes what he just told them after a while, Audrey chuckled followed by Marcus which Neil raised his eyebrows in confusion

“So Shaun was able to finally say it to you huh” Audrey said suddenly smirking at Marcus’s direction “You owe me! Pay up Marcus!”

Suddenly Marcus turned his attention to Audrey “Hey wait up, we are still not sure who among the two of them confessed Lim. Don’t get your hopes up”

Audrey scoffed at Marcus eyeing Neil sideways “Do you honestly think that Neil would be the one saying those? My complete faith in Shaun tells me otherwise” Audrey crossed her arms in front of her “As if this dense idiot would realize he likes Shaun.”

Marcus shakes his head “You are forgetting the fact that Shaun is also a dense idiot. So who can say for sure that Neil wasn’t the one who finally realized it?” Marcus looks so serious while saying this but Audrey just rolled her eyes at him

“Just pay up Marcus, I know I won stop being a sore loser”

“I am not a sore loser, I will pay up if we know how they finally got together Lim” This time it was Marcus who crossed his arms in his chest leaning back in his chair as he and Lim glares at each other

Neil looked at them “Excuse me but what the fuck are you two fighting about?” Neil knows it’s not the best to cruse in front of his technically boss but he doesn’t care right now. Because base on what he just heard, Neil can infer that there is a bet going on between the two of them that involves him and Shaun.

Marcus sighs as he knows they need to come clean with all they know, he just hopes that Neil won’t be to mad or feel betrayed, right in front of him Lim looks at Neil with a guilt expression on her face.

“Before Shaun became a second year resident here...” Marcus started deciding to tell everything “After...” Marcus clicked his tongue not really knowing how to put it in words

Marcus took a deep breath “After Shaun has proved himself to me and the board, after he became essential and important to this hospital.... I called him to my office” Marcus looks down suddenly feeling ashamed of his past interactions with Shaun, back when he was still looking at Shaun as someone autistic and not a person. “I asked him if he wanted to change to Audrey because I can see the way you treat him...”

Neil suddenly felt his heart tighten at that, Neil knows how much of an asshole he is towards Shaun in his first year as a resident. Those were the times where Neil would honestly like to punch himself for treating Shaun that way.

“I was there when Marcus called him...” Audrey said “I would love Shaun to have under my guidance that’s why I was the one who suggested a switch between residents.”

Marcus looked at Neil “He flat out refused.” Marcus broke the eye contact as he stared at the plant that was near the door, his eyes distant as if he was remembering what happened during that time

“Shaun said that he needed you to accept him, and he said he still isn’t done with it just yet. Shaun said that he was okay with the way you are treating him because he knows he would be worth it in the end.”

Neil swallowed a sudden lump in his throat, now all he wants to do is to go back to Shaun and hug the younger man so tight and offer him everything he has. But Neil knows that his guilt for treating Shaun that way would never fade away.

“Then we asked why he is like that...” Marcus continued “Then all of the sudden Shaun turned his back at us then showed us his soulmate mark.”

“We immediately know that he is your soulmate, and we understood why Shaun doesn’t want to transfer out of your team” Audrey said as she gently touch the back of Neil’s hand in a comforting manner, Neil smiles at her grateful for the action

Marcus cleared his throat “So Shaun and I made a deal, that by the end of his second year and you still haven’t change the way you treat him, he would be out of your team and into Audrey’s instead.”

Audrey smiled at Neil “And I was so thankful that it didn’t happened because the moment Shaun became a second year you two are suddenly hanging out together, eating and talking even though it is not work related. I’m very happy and proud for Shaun because he managed to connect with you”

Marcus also offered Neil a genuine smile “He is a good influence on you Neil, I’m glad things worked out between the two of you.”

Neil looked at the both of them, Neil gently smiled looking at his soulmate mark “I am glad too. I... can’t imagine my life without Shaun now” Neil gently caressed his soulmate mark “This time, I promise that I would love him and won’t let anyone treat him the way he doesn’t deserve.”

Audrey and Marcus grins at him, liking the way Neil looks. He looks so happy and contented and as their long time friend, they are truly happy for him for finally finding his soulmate.

“Now then it’s time to know who won the bet!” Audrey said thankful that the atmosphere is now light between the three of them. “Who confessed between the two of you?”

Neil eyed her, after couple of minutes Neil could say that this conversation would not end not until he tells them the truth “I did”

Marcus suddenly let out a huge shout of ‘YES’ that made Neil and Audrey jump in their chair a little bit. Suddenly Marcus calmed down and cough trying to regain dignity “Called it! Knew it!”

Audrey glared at Neil then at Marcus “I hate the both of you” she said as she reached down her pocket to get her wallet out, she handed Marcus a 100 dollar bill that Marcus gratefully accepts

“I’m going to frame this one with a note that never bet against me, because I always win.”

Neil looks not amused by all of this but decided to stay silent as he knows he owes the two of them for silently supporting him and Shaun. And without further ado, Marcus opened his table desk as he hands Neil the HR form needed to be signed. Neil looked at the papers in surprised because he already saw the signature of Marcus and surprisingly Dr. Glassman himself

Marcus chuckled at his expression “Did you think that Dr. Glassman doesn’t know? You might want to talk to him officially though.”

Audrey looked at him a sympathy look in her face “I’ll pray for you Neil don’t worry.”

And honestly Neil thinks that he would need that pray from the both of them when he did finally talk to Aaron about his relationship with Shaun. He just hopes that Aaron wouldn’t be too harsh on him. _He hopes._

**~o~oOo~o~**

It’s late in the afternoon, nearing almost 6 pm. Liam knows that he had work for that day but as he drinks another bottle of beer he finds himself care less and less about his work. He knows that Alex has been trying to contact him all day but he didn’t have the energy to face anyone.

Liam throws the now empty bottle with such force that it shattered into the ground. Liam looked at the calendar reminder that he set himself. The day where his soulmate mark disappeared, _the day Steve died_. Liam spends the rest of his day in bed not having the energy to get up much less go to work. So he spends the whole day in his couch drinking beer after beer until his vision started spinning from all the alcohol he has been drinking.

Every day of the year without fail, his routine would be like this. He is mourning for the death of his soulmate, he is angry with himself, and angry at how life is so unfair for him. Why did Steve have to die? Why did he have to leave Steve? Liam thinks that if Steve didn’t die, if Steve was still here, they would be a happy couple. At this point Steve would be a grown man, and they could be finally be together just like how fate would have wanted it, after all they are soulmates right? _So why did he had to die all of the sudden_.

Liam opens another bottle probably his 19th for the day he really doesn’t keep track, all he knows is that he is pretty much drank and alone. Liam’s eyes suddenly landed on the jacket that is placed in one of the kitchen chair. _That is Shaun’s jacket_. Shaun let him borrow it when he pretty much begged the other man because he felt chilly one day at work and he didn’t bring any jacket with him. It’s a bit small on him put it surprisingly fits him.

Liam stood up wobbling a little as he tries to steady himself. When he reached the kitchen he picked up the jacket. He didn’t know why but he felt that he needed to return it to Shaun. It’s a good thing that Shaun’s apartment is only a 15 minute walk away from his own.

He grabbed the jacket and tries to walk straight proving it hard because of how much he feels dizzy probably from too much alcohol he consumed. As he opened and closed his front door behind him, Liam took a deep breath feeling the chilly winds hit his face.

_Finally after years of spending this day alone and drunk, He would see a part of Steve today_.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Shaun was just reading some of his old medical books when he heard a knock on the door, a little bit too loud for his liking. He glanced at his cellphone to see what time is it; Shaun knows that Neil would be off his shift in about an hour now, so he knows that the one knocking in his door is not Neil. Shaun got up to open the front door, and he was surprise when he saw Liam almost leaning all his weight at the side frame of his front door. Shaun sniffs the air and he cringed at the very obvious scent of alcohol reeking from Liam.

Shaun was suddenly pushed aside as Liam stride inside his apartment before sitting in one of the kitchen chair Shaun has. Shaun not knowing what to do exactly just closed the front door as he walk in front of where Liam is currently sitting.

“What happened to you and why do you smell so awful?” Shaun started but he didn’t dare to be close to Liam as he can’t stand the smell of alcohol in him.

Liam snorted loudly at him “You know exactly what day it is Shaun, don’t be stupid.”

Shaun’s eyes glanced downwards as he took a deep breath; he knows what Liam is talking about. It’s just that Shaun has a different way of coping with the fact that today is the death anniversary of his younger brother, a coping mechanism involving no alcohol at all just a quite day where he could remember his younger brother. “I know what day it is today Liam, I... just didn’t know you are like this”

Shaun suddenly flinched as Liam stood up all too suddenly causing the chair to fall with a deafening sound. Shaun took a step backward as he saw Liam approaching him until his back hit the wall and Liam is right in front of him expression unreadable “How the fuck am I suppose to be Shaun?” Liam muttered angrily still not looking at Shaun but rather at the ground “Steve is dead, my soulmate is dead I have literally no one”

Shaun would probably feel pity for Liam but right now all he could feel is a little bit of fear and chill all over his body. He is starting to get really uncomfortable which Shaun finds alarming because he never felt this way with Liam. Shaun tried to keep his breathing steady as he suddenly felt like he was caged because of the small distance between him and Liam.

“I...” Shaun clasped his hand in front of him “I’m sorry...”

Apparently that was not what Liam wanted to hear as he suddenly punch the wall just a couple of inches away from Shaun’s head. Shaun stared at him with eyes widen, horrified at what just happened “Sorry? The fuck are you sorry at? Being sorry doesn’t bring him back. _Nothing can bring him back Shaun.”_

Shaun placed his hand in Liam’s chest as he pushed him hard that Liam lost his balance and ended up sitting on the floor. Shaun is breathing hard at this point, it’s a strange feeling that you feel unsafe at your own home together with someone whom you considered as a friend “You... you didn’t just lost a soulmate Liam. **I lost my younger brother _my only family_**.” Shaun practically shouted at him. Shaun turned his back on him intending to leave his own apartment because right now his instinct is screaming at him to get away from Liam. The man is intoxicated and Shaun knows firsthand what alcohol could do to you.

But before he could get further away from Liam, the man all of the sudden grabbed his wrist. As Shaun struggled to free his wrist, he tripped into his own bed causing him to fall into it back first. He watched in horror as Liam crawled on top of him pinning both his arms to the side of his head.

Shaun tries to hold back the tears that was threatening to fall out of his eyes, right now as he looks at Liam like he doesn’t even know this man. He could see Liam looking at him but at the same time his eyes are distant. Shaun choked a broken sob as Liam started kissing the side of his neck. Shaun closed his eyes as tears started falling as he tried to fight free but Liam despite being drunk is still stronger than him.

“P-please stop... I don’t want this stop...” Shaun begged, he could feel his energy stating to deplete because he just can’t believe Liam would do this to him. He considered him like an older brother and yet he is forcing himself into him.

“You look just like Steve....” Liam suddenly whispered in his ears, gently nibbling Shaun’s ears before biting it down. “You could be Steve just for today...”

Shaun’s cries grew louder as he could feel Liam forcefully opening his leg so he could place his body between them. Shaun suddenly felt Liam’s hand inside his clothes and the other one in his pants trying to open his zipper. Shaun placed his both of his hands into Liam’s shoulder as he tried to push him away but Liam didn’t even bulge.

“GET OFF ME!” Shaun shouted hoping that his neighbour would hear him, because he knows that he couldn’t physically fight Liam even at his drunken state.

Liam seems undisturbed by his shout as he just looked at him “Why can’t you be Steve...” Liam said quietly as he leaned down and forcefully kissed Shaun in his mouth.

Shaun is starting to feel disgusted at himself, he can’t believe he is letting Liam do this to him, just how will he face Neil after all of this? Shaun gasped as Liam painfully bit down his lower lips that Shaun is sure that it would bleed, Liam used the opportunity to deepen their kiss. Tears after tears are starting to fall from Shaun’s eyes as he starting to feel helpless. But still he continued to struggle to push and punch Liam everywhere his hands could reach.

“Liam please stop... I- I don’t want this I don’t... please stop please” Shaun sobbed hoping that Liam would come to his senses. But Liam just continued to pry open his pants until Shaun heard his zippers being open and Liam is starting to tug his pants down. “I AM NOT STEVE!”

All of the sudden Liam stop what he was doing and he looked at Shaun who is covering his face as he cries violently breathing heavily. Suddenly there was a knock on the door

“Shaun? Are you alright I could hear shouting?!”

Seeing Liam suddenly distracted Shaun used it push Liam away and kicking him off him, Shaun immediately scrambled towards the door he opened it and closed it behind him never looking back at Liam.

The moment the door shut close, Liam realized what he had just done. _Or what he was supposed to do to Shaun._ Tears suddenly escaped his eyes, regret and guilt evident in his face

“I’m so sorry...” Liam whispered into the empty apartment, silence resonating within the walls.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Lea was peacefully preparing her dinner for the night when she suddenly heard shouting coming from Shaun’s. She knows something wrong is happening because she knows that Shaun is generally a very quiet guy. So she turned off the stove and went to Shaun.

As she knocked on the door she was surprised that Shaun got out of his apartment looking like a dishevelled. Without any word she gently guided Shaun towards her own apartment. Letting Shaun sit down at one of the couches. The moment Shaun sat down he immediately hugged himself rocking back and forth slightly that made Lea very worried for him.

She could silently hear Shaun crying and breathing heavily, and she knows she can’t talk and touch him at this state because she might make it worse. So she just gently covered Shaun in the softest blanket she owns. She kneeled down in front of Shaun, still being mindful of his personal space

“Do you want me to call Neil? I’m sure he could help you Shaun.”

When Lea saw Shaun nodded she got up to dial Neil. She and Neil are friends simply because they have interacted a good amount of times when Neil would spend his time in Shaun’s apartment. She also knows that Neil is Shaun’s soulmate, she accidentally saw Shaun half-naked, but Shaun begged her to stay silent until he had the courage to confess to Neil himself. The day she learned that, is the day where she silently support Neil and Shaun’s very obvious feelings for one another. That’s why Lea knows that in Shaun’s state , only Neil could help him in this state.

She took a deep breath as she dialled Neil’s number, hoping he would answer.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Neil was just finished with signing couple of paperworks when he heard his office door open. He smiled when he saw Alex entering. “I’m done with my shift. I haven’t seen Dr. Anderson the whole day, I tried contacting him but he wouldn’t answer”

Neil scoffed “It’s his fourth day here and he is already slacking off. Some doctor that he is.”

Alex laughed at him as he watched Neil gather his things “Cut the guy some slack, you already knows how he feels about Shaun.”

Neil rolled his eyes at him “And that feeling better stay the same.” Neil opened his office door as they both got out. Walking towards the elevator “Shaun is mine and he should back off now. Because I swear if he ever does something to Shaun that Shaun isn’t comfortable with I’m going to beat the shit out of him.”

Alex looked at him warily somehow believing Neil would really do that. They heard Neil’s phone ring. Neil took out his phone from his pocket expecting that Shaun is the one calling him, but he was surprised when it was Lea instead. Suddenly a sense of dread settled within him, beside him he could feel Alex also tensed by the sudden change in his demeanour.

“Hello? Lea is something wrong?” Neil asked as finally the elevator arrived. They both step inside as Alex pressed the ground floor button.

**“I... I don’t know what happened but Shaun needs you like right now.”**

Neil is grateful when the elevator doors finally opened, he and Alex quickly left the hospital and into the parking lot

“Where is he right now?” Neil demanded

**“In my apartment... I think there is someone in Shaun’s apartment right now. Because all I know is that Shaun is shouting then all of the sudden when he left his apartment he was crying and looking so dishevelled. Just come quickly okay?”**

Neil hang up on Lea as he quickly started the engine of his car, worry and dread is seen from his face. Beside him Alex looked at him “Do you want me to drive instead?”

Neil gripped the steering wheel taking a deep breath “No it’s okay I can manage. The call was about Shaun.”

Alex tensed up as he heard Neil say that. They finally drove off the parking lot, all the while Alex is eyeing Neil who is determined to get to Shaun as fast as he could.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Lea finally sighs in relief when he heard Neil knocked in her front door. She got up from where she was sitting near Shaun as she opened the door and was greeted by Neil and another man

“Where is he?” Neil asked breathlessly

“In the couch” Lea pointed out as Neil immediately went towards Shaun.

Lea looked at the man in front of her, she smiled at him which the other man returned “I’m Alex, Shaun and Neil’s friends and work colleague.”

They shook hands “My name is Lea Shaun’s neighbour and his friend.” Lea let Alex go in as they both went to the living room.

The moment Shaun heard Neil’s voice he can’t help but cry again, he wants nothing more than to hug Neil and completely forget what just happened to him but he knows that it wasn’t that easy. When Neil finally kneeled in front of him, his brown eyes looking at him worriedly, Shaun could feel Neil’s anger slowly rising up as he noticed Shaun’s bruised lips, the hand marks on his wrist that Neil knows he didn’t do because he won’t ever leave a mark in Shaun that looked painful, and finally taking in his overall appearance. Neil’s eyes darken in anger as Shaun bit his lips trying to control his emotion

“Neil... I’m so sorry I... I didn’t... I swear I tried to fight him off...”

Alex and Lea are quietly watching with concerned look in their faces. They all want to know what happened but they can’t force Shaun to talk because they didn’t want them to overwhelm Shaun as of the moment.

Neil gently cupped Shaun’s face as his eyes directly looked at Shaun “Shaun whatever happened wasn’t your fault. Don’t ever apologize for something you have no control over okay? I love you Shaun, nothing could change that.”

Shaun finally let his emotion let go as he cried once again, Neil immediately hugged Shaun as Shaun sobbed hugging Neil tighter. Neil whispered different assurances in Shaun’s ears, saying how much he loves him. Shaun is very thankful to have Neil by his side.

“Please tell me what happened Shaun, I promise you I won’t ever become mad at you Shaun. I love you and I just want to protect you, please trust me” 

Shaun nodded as he slowly broke off the hug he looked at Neil then at Alex and Lea “L-Liam h-he...” Shaun swallowed “He... he came by my apartment to... return my jacket then he suddenly got mad at me. He almost...” Shaun clenched his fist which Neil gently undo placing soft kisses in Shaun’s hands. Neil is patiently waiting for Shaun to continue “He almost... he almost forced me to have sex with him... He said that he wished that I was _Steve_. He said that... I looked so much like Steve that’s why he did that... He almost... but Lea suddenly knocked on my door that’s why I was able to get away from him”

Alex and Lea suddenly felt tense as they saw Neil’s expression, _he looked livid._ And Alex could feel himself getting angry at what he just heard. He can’t believe he let his sympathy get the best of his judgement, and now Shaun was almost _raped_ because of his poor judgment.

Neil took a deep breath, trying to control his emotions the best he could. He couldn’t let Shaun see this side of him, not when Shaun just went through something traumatic “Shaun...” Neil gently cupped Shaun’s face making Shaun look directly at him. Blue eyes meeting brown ones’ “What happened wasn’t your fault okay? It doesn’t make you less of a person.” Neil kissed Shaun in his forehead “I love you Shaun, so much.”

Shaun nodded as Neil leaned in to place a soft sweet kiss in his lips which Shaun eagerly accepted. Neil broke off the kiss not wanting to further bruise Shaun’s lips. Neil gently smiled at Shaun which thankfully Shaun returned. Neil gently caressed the reddening marks on Shaun’s wrist, his anger slowly rising up again. _How dare that fucker hurt Shaun_. Speaking of which....

Neil looked at Alex and Lea. Both of them doesn’t need Neil to explain what he was about to do, Lea just suddenly took a deep sharp breath while Alex nodded solemnly. As much as Alex would want to stop Neil he knows that he can’t even if he tried to. Right now he isn’t Dr. Neil Melendez who has a reputation to uphold in the hospital, no. Right now he is just Neil Melendez whose lover almost got raped and hurt in the process.

Alex almost felt sorry for Liam. _Almost_. But that fucker would deserve it.

“Shaun how about we eat dinner now? I have cooked enough food for all of us”

Shaun looked at Lea then at Neil who just smiled at him “You should eat Shaun, I don’t like you skipping.” Neil gently guided Shaun into the kitchen as he could see Shaun wobbled probably from exhaustion. “I’ll be back okay? I’m just going to do something important.”

Neil could see Shaun tensed at his words “Are... are you going back to my apartment?” Shaun asked quietly

Instead of answering Neil offered Shaun a soft smile “Do you trust me Shaun?”

Without any second thoughts Shaun nodded which made Neil very delighted to see it “I want you to understand and know that what I’m about to do is to try to protect you Shaun, you know I would never let anything harm you.”

Shaun once again nodded gesturing Neil to lean down, after sharing a short but passionate kiss, Shaun was the first one to break it. He looked Neil directly in the eyes, Shaun knows that he can’t stop Neil. “I love you Neil.”

“I love you too Shaun” Neil straightened his back as he turned his attention back at Lea “Make sure he eats okay? He almost weights next to nothing.”

Lea chuckled despite what they just learned she is very happy that the two of them seems together now and very much happy. “I’ll make sure Shaun would eat for two.”

Neil gave Shaun a finally kiss on his forehead before walking out of the kitchen, but not before looking at Alex. Seemingly challenging the other man to try and stop him, not that Alex would. Alex nodded at him understanding everything. Neil is somehow grateful that Alex would let him have this

“Take care of him for me? I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

Alex nodded “Don’t worry I’ll take care of everything here.”

The moment Neil closed the front door behind him he took a deep breath, letting his anger consume him as he stride towards Shaun’s apartment hoping that the fucker is still there.

**_After all he had some score to settle._ **

****

**~o~oOo~o~**

**A/N: :O**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I kinda forgot this fic is still unfinished XD**

**~o~oOo~o~**

Neil looked at the door right in front of him, he could feel his knuckles clenches as he stared at the door. He knows once he goes in, his rational side would be gone in an instant especially if Liam is still inside Shaun’s apartment. Neil took a deep breath in a poor attempt to calm himself down, he slowly opened the door. The first thing he noticed upon entering is that the lights are still on. When he entered, he slowly closed the door behind him. Neil could feel himself shaking in anger when he finally saw Liam sitting in the edge of Shaun’s be, his head hung low.

“ **Give me one good fucking reason right now on why I should not kill you** ”

Liam was startled when he heard someone talk, he immediately snapped his head towards the owner of the voice. The voice sounds familiar and yet at the same time not. Liam was surprised to see Neil looking down at him with a disgust and hatred very clear in his eyes.

Liam took a deep breath before standing up to face Neil “You should... what I did to Shaun was unforgivable...”

In any other day, Neil would probably feel sympathy for Liam, because Neil could clearly see the remorse in his expression. But right now all of Neil’s thoughts are all about ‘what ifs’. What if Liam did manage to rape Shaun, what if Shaun didn’t fought back hard, and what if Lea didn’t knock. He let those thoughts eat him as he suddenly swung a punch at Liam, feeling Liam’s nose let out a sickening crunch the moment his fist fit Liam’s face.

Neil watched as Liam crumbled into the ground holding his now bleeding nose as his eyes are widen in surprised at the sudden punch Neil gave him. Neil was breathing heavily at this point, adrenaline coursing through his body as he watches Liam in pain.

Neil grabbed Liam’s t-shirt forcing Liam to face him despite his bleeding nose “What you did to Shaun was **beyond unforgivable**. The pain you put him through, the way you broke his trust **to you** , and the way you almost break Shaun as a person. **All of those are unforgivable** , and if you think that I am furious just because you almost raped Shaun? Fucking think again.” Neil could almost chuckle at Liam’s expression right now “I’m furious because you hurt the **one and** **only** important person in my life. **My soulmate.** So I don’t give a fucking damn what happens to you starting from now on. I’ll make sure not even your shadow would be seen in the hospital, I’ll make sure of that.” Neil released Liam’s t-shirt as he watched Liam stumbled back a bit.

Liam could feel his blood run cold because of the way Neil looks, the days he spent making this man jealous and angry he had never seen him like this. **He didn’t think anyone could look like this**. For the first time in his life, Liam felt scared.

“I could handle you messing up with me...” Neil looked directly at Liam making “But the moment you made Shaun feel disgusted by himself is the moment I’ll make sure you will regret what you fucking did.” Neil glared at Liam, uncaring at the way his nose looks broken and his cheeks in the verge of swollen because of him. “You should be thankful I only punched you. Because really if I am not a doctor with a duty to uphold you would be swimming with the fishes right now.” Neil chuckled darkly enjoying the thought but he knows he can’t do that because of his moral duties. But if Neil is being honest right now, the only thing stopping him is the thought that Shaun would surely be terrified of him. And well, Neil can’t stand that idea of Shaun hating him. 

Neil looked at his wrist watch, noting that it is almost getting late. As much as he wants to fuck Liam’s face up, he knows that Shaun needs him more. “Well I hope you pack your things and leave because there won’t be any available position for you at St. Bonaventure.”

Neil didn’t even wait for Liam’s reply, he turned his back at him as he left Shaun’s apartment. Neil cleared his thoughts as to not scare Shaun with his expression right now.

Shaun needs him, and Neil would make sure that he will be there for Shaun.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Neil patiently waits as Shaun is still showering in the bathroom. When he left Shaun’s apartment Neil immediately went back to Lea’s to pick up Shaun. When he got there they could all clearly see just how tired Shaun is. Neil thanked Lea and Alex as he guided Shaun into his car and when they finally arrived at Neil’s home, Shaun immediately went to the bathroom to shower. Neil could feel himself getting worried and anxious as the minutes past because of how distant Shaun looks and how quite he is.

Finally the bathroom door opened and Shaun exited out. Neil watched as Shaun quietly sat down on his bed looking at the floor. Neil went towards him as he kneeled down in front of Shaun. He gently took Shaun’s both hands so he could hold it. Neil smiled as Shaun looked at him.

“Are you mad at me...?”

Neil was honestly surprised at Shaun’s question, he could feel his heart tighten at how broken Shaun sounded when he asked that. Neil kissed Shaun’s hands before answering “Shaun what happened tonight was and will never be your fault okay?” Neil looked directly at Shaun “I will never be mad at you especially if none of this is your fault. I love you Shaun nothing could change that, not even what happened today.”

Neil could see Shaun tearing up, Neil opened his arms and almost immediately Shaun hugged him tight “I... I just don’t understand why he would do that... I trusted him...” Shaun can’t stop the tears from falling even if he tried to “I... I thought of him as a brother... and yet... and yet...!”

Neil let Shaun bury his head into the space between his shoulder and neck. He gently soothes Shaun as he could hear Shaun crying hard. Neil knows that Shaun doesn’t easily trust people, so it really breaks Shaun when someone betrayed his trust. And Neil thinks how unfair it is, on why all of this is happening to Shaun.

“The thing I hate the most is that... I can’t really hate Liam... I really can’t” Neil knows just how good Shaun is, that no matter what, he always look for something to see the good in people, to forgive them no matter how much they have wronged Shaun.

Shaun was the first one to break their hug. Neil gently caressed Shaun’s face as he wipes the stray of tears falling from his blue eyes. “Today.... is the death anniversary of Steve. That’s why he seeks me out and he wished that I was Steve instead...”

Neil’s eyes widen at that, he didn’t know that information but he did know that Liam is Steve’s soulmate. “Shaun you need to understand that even though he is grieving that doesn’t make what he did right especially to you Shaun...”

“I know that! I know but... part of me knows I deserved what happened....”

Neil could feel his blood run cold at Shaun’s statement. He made Shaun looked at him, Neil’s expression slowly morphing into an angry one, not at Shaun of course but at Liam “Shaun no. Nobody deserved what happened to you, no one does. Please don’t ever think that because it would break you Shaun, **it would break me too**. If you think of that... please Shaun you deserve better than to think that to yourself.”

“B-but.... because of me.... they weren’t able to be together. All because of me Steve died... because of me...”

Neil took a deep breath calming himself down, he can’t be angry he knows this. “Shaun... I truly don’t know the connection you had with Liam especially the connection Liam and Steve had shared but....” Neil looks at Shaun “I know for a fact that... Steve will never regret the way he protected you, because I know... something tells me that Steve loved you more than anything else in this world including his very own soulmate. So please, love yourself the way Steve had loved you when he was still alive Shaun, you have to.”

Neil could feel the tension and anger disappear the moment Shaun slowly nodded fresh tears are starting to form in his eyes “Until now... everything I do is for Steve. He was my inspiration on who I am today. And I....” Shaun took a deep breath trying and failing to hold back his tears “I wished that he was still here... and that he would be proud of whom I am today...”

Neil gently smiled “Shaun... Steve would be happy and proud of how far you have reached in your life, I know because I am. I am proud of how strong you are, and happy because you did everything you had to do for you to be here.” Neil leaned his forehead into Shaun who happily accepted the small contact between them “I am proud of you Shaun Murphy.”

Shaun could feel his heart swell in happiness and love when he heard Neil say that to him. All his life, Shaun was used to people looking down at him even with his accomplishment. So to hear that someone was proud of him and who he is today, felt like a miracle especially since it came from his very own soulmate, **his better half**. Shaun closed his eyes as he and Neil shared a kissed. Savouring the precious moment between the two of them, basking in Neil’s unconditional love to him.

Shaun thinks that he would be okay, as long as Neil would be with him every single day. And for the first time in a very long time, Shaun looks forward to the future in front of him with Neil by his side.

**~o~oOo~o~**

Marcus was surprised that early in the morning Neil would want to see him in his office. He received a very short message from Neil yesterday night that despite being his day off he would need to see Marcus in his office. After that he received another text message from Aaron himself stating that Shaun would need another day off also.

And of course Marcus was in no position to reject the request of the president, but it did make him wonder what happened. But he knows that it would not take it long for him to find out especially the moment he arrived at the hospital at exactly 6 am, Neil was already standing outside his office door. In any other day he would teased the other man but the moment he really looked at Neil’s composure and the tension surrounding him, Marcus shut his mouth.

When Marcus and Neil made eye contact with one another, Marcus instantly knows that Neil isn’t in the mood for pleasantries and thus he just opened his office door knowing that Neil would follow him inside. Marcus sat down in his chair as Neil also did the same

“Reject Liam Anderson’s application as a doctor here and if you would not then I will resign.” Neil said casually as if he was just talking about the weather, Marcus on the other hand was flabbergasted by the statement.

“E-excuse me...? You would resign?” Marcus still can’t believe what he was hearing, and to be fair it is still early in the morning to be having this kind of conversation.

“Yes” Neil said with such conviction that Marcus knows that he is not joking

“Why would you do that? I mean I know that you and Dr. Anderson are not on good terms but Neil you know that you have no say in who we should hire or not. Especially since Dr. Anderson’s performance so far has been good and efficient, it would be a waste to let him go.”

Neil scoffed at Marcus “Is that a no then?” Neil suddenly reached out in his bag to pull off a white small envelope “Here is my resignation letter then.” Neil easily slid the envelope into Marcus’s direction

Marcus looked at the envelope and he is sure that Neil would really resign if he didn’t address this carefully. Marcus knows that he can’t let Neil go; the board would not allow one of the best surgeons they have to leave St. Bonaventure. A lot of hospitals would easily accept Neil especially with his reputation, losing Neil would be a huge loss in the hospital. And Marcus knows he can’t afford that. What Marcus wants to know is that why Neil is currently doing this. Marcus knows Neil for a long time now, he knows that Neil would only act like this because **something** really bad has happened enough to make Neil Melendez do something irrational like this. Suddenly it all clicked to Marcus on who could make Neil act like this. _Shaun._

“Is this about the fight you and Dr. Anderson has that involves Shaun?” Marcus started very carefully knowing that if it involves Shaun he can’t put any blame on Shaun because that would be unfair for him. Shaun has no control over the two of them especially the hatred that formed between the two doctors “Because I have personally witness the tension between the two of you and Neil, you know we can’t deny Dr. Anderson the opportunity to work here just because you feel... threatened because of him and his interaction with Shaun... Dr. Anderson could file us a lawsuit because of this reason.”

Neil clenched his jaw at Marcus’s accusation that Neil is only doing this for himself, for his own benefit “Do you think I would give up everything I have in this hospital for something that trivial?” Neil scoffed “Everything I fucking do, I do it for Shaun. And honestly Marcus? If you fucking hire him, lawsuit would be the very least of your worries. Trust me, I would do something worst than a petty lawsuit.”

Marcus’s confusion must have been showing in his face because suddenly Neil sighed deeply, maybe an attempt to gather his thoughts. After a few moments of silence Neil decided to once again talk

“He almost raped Shaun yesterday night.”

Marcus’s eyes widen at that. Neil looked down because it hurts for him to say that because it would be a painful reminder of how he failed to protect Shaun. He and Shaun actually talked about what happened that night after calming themselves down. Shaun is torn between not wanting to ever see Liam ever again or to just forgive him and move on. In the end Shaun said that he trust Neil more than anything in the world and would let him decide for the both of them, including whether or not they would disclose this information to their friends.

Marcus still couldn’t believe what he just heard, now he fully understands on where Neil is coming from. Right now he could actually admire Neil, because he knows that if he were to be in his position right now, his job would be the least of his worry. If that was his wife instead... Marcus couldn’t even finish the thought.

Neil looked at him anger evident in his eyes “So here is would happen Marcus, you would reject that fucker’s application and all of us would continue the same old way, me working here and Shaun would be a permanent doctor here.” Neil suddenly chuckled darkly “Or we could do this the hard way. You accept his application, let him work here. And you would lose me as a doctor and risk losing Shaun. Because you know I would make sure that Aaron would know what happened to **his son**.” Neil suddenly stood up, looking down on Marcus. And if Neil did that gesture in any other day Marcus’s pride would never allow it, but right now Marcus knows that in this conversation he really doesn’t have a choice but to follow what Neil wants.

Neil walked towards the door seemingly satisfied that he got what he wants “You know me Marcus, the way I protect what is mine.” Neil looked back at Marcus “I would not stop until I get what I want. I failed to protect Shaun this time but rest assured, I would never fail again. Even if it means bringing down the whole hospital’s reputation down the drain I would do it. Imagine the news in the medical community if ever someone finds out that St. Bonaventure hired a rapist.” Neil could see the dread in Marcus’s face at what he is implying as of now “I really suggest Marcus for you to think about this. Because right now.... what I am doing isn’t even an inch close on what I could truly do for Shaun.”

Marcus stared at the now closed door where Neil just left. Marcus suddenly swallowed the lump that suddenly formed in his throat as he finds it hard to breathe a little after the conversation they just had. Marcus could swear he never had seen Neil like that, looking back Marcus can’t even tell if that really is the Neil he truly knows. Marcus thinks that what he just saw is the other side of Neil that nobody really would want to see. Marcus dreads on what Neil could truly do for Shaun.

Marcus stared at the enveloped in front of him; he picked it up and opened it. Marcus let out a shuddering sigh as he read the contents of what is inside the letter. It really is a legit resignation letter complete with Neil and even the President’s signature. Marcus is almost afraid to know on how Neil talked to Aaron about signing the papers. Because like Marcus, Aaron knows just how valuable Neil is to the whole hospital. So for him to sign Neil’s resignation letter means Neil somehow manage to convince Aaron or even threatened.

Marcus ripped apart the resignation letter, and he laid his forehead on his table. He could feel a headache coming up and it is still early in the morning. Marcus took a deep breath hoping that what happened between him and Neil would be the last. He doesn’t really need a repeat, **he doesn’t want to**.

Marcus took out Liam Anderson’s personal file as he searched for his personal number in the file provided. Without any hesitation he dialled the number hoping that the other doctor would answer him. He waited until Liam finally picked up the phone.

“This is Marcus Andrews, Dr. Liam Anderson you would need to come into my office for an urgent meeting. I would expect you to be here at the earliest you could.”

**~o~oOo~o~**

Shaun woke up to an empty bed beside him. He felt that the side where Neil slept is already cold indicating that Neil left very early to talk to Marcus. He and Neil talked all night until both of them are tired. Shaun felt his chest lighter because of the way Neil assured him all night that what happened to him isn’t his fault. Shaun is so thankful that Neil is there for him. He was about to check his phone but then he remembered he left all of his things at his apartment because of what happened.

Shaun knows it’s irrational to feel fear that he would eventually have to go back to his apartment because he knows that Liam would not be there and he would be safe but right now Shaun can’t really see himself going back to his apartment for an indefinite amount of time. It’s a good thing that he and Neil had already decided make this their home. If it’s any other person Shaun would feel like they are moving fast, but with Neil he knows that their pace is just right between the two of them especially since Shaun waited for Neil for 3 years and Neil waited for him since the very beginning.

Shaun looked around the room and he was thankful that there is a wall clock so he wouldn’t need to guess what time it is. _7 am_. Shaun knows that he is given by Aaron a day off again and is already approved of Marcus, but once he is awake he would stay awake so there is no use in going back to bed to sleep again. Shaun doesn’t like skipping work but for the first time he knows he really needs it. The bruise in his lips cause by Liam and the marks from his wrist is still very fresh looking and visible. Shaun knows a day would not heal them, but his day off was for his emotional and mental health because he knows that he can’t face Liam today, or ever. Shaun wants to forgive him and he knows he would but he can’t not until he knows that Liam is truly sorry for what he did. And Neil already made it very clear that he would not let Liam go near him again, Shaun truly appreciates him.

The only thing in Shaun’s mind right now is how he is going to explain this to Aaron himself. It was actually one of his worries yesterday night, and he voiced this out to Neil. Shaun is scared that Aaron would do something to Liam if he ever finds out what happened and as much as Shaun dislikes Liam right now, he doesn’t want to cause Liam any permanent damage especially in his reputation. Neil just assured him that he would handle everything and if ever Shaun is ready to tell Aaron what happened to him then Neil would be there for him. Right now though, he doesn’t want Aaron to know. In fact, Shaun doesn’t want anyone to know not because he is ashamed of what happened to him, after all because of Neil he knows that none of it is his fault and therefore he should not feel any shame at all. But rather he is concerned about what would happen to Liam and his career as a doctor. What Liam did to him was unforgivable but Shaun still thinks that he doesn’t want to be the reason why Liam would lose everything he has.

Shaun got out of bed immediately fixing the sheets and pillow before going inside the bathroom to do his morning routine. After everything, he stared at the mirror. Noticing that several of the marks that Neil has left in his body is still visible while some are already fading especially those marks that are in his neck. But as he stared at his bruised lips he suddenly felt a wave of sympathy and sadness for Liam. After all Shaun can’t imagine losing Neil all of the sudden, leaving only small amount of memories with him. Shaun just wished that Liam didn’t do what he almost did because right now it’s hard to find a solid reason to forgive Liam.

Upon leaving the bathroom, Shaun went downstairs as he can already hear several pans being rustled in the kitchen. Not a moment after Shaun could already see Neil back from the hospital and is already prepare breakfast for the both of them.

Neil immediately spotted him; he went in front of him and hugged Shaun who returned it eagerly. “I didn’t think that you would be awake already, I mean it’s still fairly early Shaun.” Neil broke the hug between the two of them as he kissed Shaun’s forehead before going back to the kitchen where Shaun followed him, sitting in front of the kitchen isle in one of the chairs that is vacant and is directly in view of the kitchen.

“The bed felt cold, it’s your fault I woke up early.”

Neil chuckled at his statement “It’s not even a week and yet you are starting to take up some of my habits” Neil looked at Shaun who is smiling at his direction “Not that I mind, I mean with the two of us pulling the ‘it’s not my fault’ card I’m sure we could make Marcus’s life miserable in the hospital.” Neil paused a little bit “Or even the other’s resident’s life for that matter. We would be unstoppable Shaun, so yes by all means copy my habits.”

Shaun laughed at Neil eyeing his every movement in the kitchen “I was right, you would be a bad influence in me Neil. It’s too bad that I’m going to be stuck with you for the rest of your life.”

Instead of being insulted Neil could feel the sudden burst of happiness and love from Shaun’s statement. “I don’t mind having you; I mean... that’s what I intent to do. Keep you for myself for the rest of our lives. I am a very selfish person Shaun you should know that by now.”

“Everyone knows that Neil, just last month you refused to give Alex some of the sugar packets you got from the cafeteria just because you called dibs on them.”

Neil stopped cutting the avocadoes as he stared at Shaun who is laughing in delight by the memory “Hey I was the one who went to get those sugar packets from the cafeteria for my coffee and therefore they are mine.” Neil resumed cutting the avocadoes and after that he scoops them out with a spoon putting it a glass bowl

Shaun watched Neil as he crushed the avocadoes with a spoon. A comfortable silence overtaking them as Neil concentrates in making the breakfast while Shaun watches him. Suddenly a thought entered Shaun’s mind “I... don’t want to go back to my apartment ever again Neil. I’m scared to”

Neil immediately stopped what he is doing and went towards Shaun. He took Shaun’s hand holding them “You don’t ever need to Shaun, this is our home now. You belong here, you belong with me.” Neil smiled “This is our home now Shaun. Uh I mean well if you want another home, I could easily buy another house property, I mean I am very curious on what it’s like to live in a luxurious penthouse”

Shaun pouted every so slightly at him, seemingly displeased at his suggestion “Neil this house is already luxurious enough I really know that this costs millions on how big it is and because of the security and the good neighbourhood. Please stop spending money on things you wouldn’t need”

Neil huffed at him jokingly “But Shaun! Don’t you want a penthouse? Imagine the view we would get”

Shaun laughed at him before flicking Neil’s forehead who looked at him in surprised “Buy a penthouse and I am breaking up with you Neil Melendez”

Soon after both of them are laughing “Okay fine, no penthouse for now”

“No penthouse for forever Neil.”

Neil smiled at him “No penthouse for forever that’s fine by me, if that’s what would it take to have you with me forever.”

“You would have me for forever if you would finish what you are making because I am hungry Neil, and buying a penthouse wouldn’t make me full”

Neil mockingly bowed a little before going back to the kitchen “One of these days, I would buy a penthouse behind your back”

Shaun shakes his head “And I would break up with you behind your back”

Neil laughed at his statement as he finished what he was cooking plating it and carrying the two plates that contains of what he cooked to the dining table. He and Shaun both sat down as Shaun took a bite out of his avocado toast

Shaun smiled licking his lips “Okay maybe I won’t because your cooking is decent enough to keep me”

Neil looked at him in an offending matter “My cooking skills are superb thank you very much” Neil watches as Shaun easily ate one of the toasts he made. Neil smirked “Just decent huh? It seems like you are lying Shaun Murphy”

Shaun paused looking at Neil and at the avocado toast in front of him “I do not lie, it’s just that I am really hungry”

Neil pulled the plate away from Shaun who immediately protested “Admit that I cook very well and you would get this back”

Shaun huffed at him “Okay fine, you cook slightly better than me”

Neil laughed before returning Shaun’s plate who immediately grabbed the toast and took a bite out of it “Stay with me forever and in my future penthouse and I would cook for you every single day.”

Shaun glared at him a little bit before laughing clearly enjoying everything. And for the first time in his life Neil even though it is early in the morning, felt peace and light. He always feels empty in the morning him and his thoughts are alone in the confinement of his house that is big enough for 3 families to live in, but right now with Shaun’s echoing laughter and presences by his side, Neil could finally appreciate living his life. As long as Shaun is in it.

“Okay” Shaun whispered lovingly as he returned his attention to eating

Neil smiled at Shaun as Shaun continues to eat his breakfast in peace. Neil right there and then promised that he would do anything in his abilities to make Shaun stay with him. Even if it means doing something that would harm himself, he knows that Shaun's happiness and his well-being would be his top priority starting from now on. 

Even if it includes not buying that damned penthouse he so wants. Because he knows that where Shaun is, is where his home is. It doesn’t matter where they live, whether it is a small house, a mansion and even in a cattle house, Neil wouldn’t mind.

Because now he knows that the true meaning of home is that where he would feel peace, happiness, contentment and the feeling of being loved unconditionally, is the very same feeling he has when he is together with Shaun.

Shaun is his home, and Neil would gladly give up everything he has to maintain that because he knows that deep down, Shaun feels the very same way he does when both of them are together.

**~o~oOo~o~**

**A/N: The next chapter would be the very last for this fic!**


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